Just ....

(1) Funny

2010-04-21T07:21:00.000-07:00

Gordon Brown was lookin for a lady of the night. He found a girl in a local pub. He said: "I'm Prime minister of England, how much would it cost me to spend time with you ...?"

Her reply: "Mr prime minister, if you can get my skirt as high as my taxes, my pants as low as my wages, your dick as hard as the times we're living in and keep it rising like the price of petrol and screw me the way you have the pensioners - then it won't cost a fucking penny!"

------------------------------------------------------------------

Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up?

Because they don't have balls to scratch.

------------------------------------------------------------------

I asked my wife: "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?"

She said: "Somewhere I have never been!"

------------------------------------------------------------------

I told her: "How about the kitchen?"

A lecturer teaching medicine was giving a classoom observation. He took out a jar of yellow liquid. "This," he explained, "is urine. To be a doctor, you have to be observant of color, smell, sight, and taste."

After saying so, he dipped his finger into the jar and put it into his mouth. His class watched in amazement, most in disgust. But being the good students that they were, the jar was passed, and one by one, they dipped their finger into the jar and put it into their mouths.

After the last student was done, the lecturer shook his head. "If any of you had been observant, you would have noticed that I put my second finger into the jar and my third finger into my mouth."

------------------------------------------------------------------

Dr. Phil was conducting a therapy session with four young mothers and their small children.

"You all have obsessions" he observed.

To the first mother he said: "You are so obsessed with eating you've even named your daughter Candy."

He turned to the second mom: "Your obsession is money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny."

He turns to the third mom: "Your obsession is alcohol. This, too, manifests itself in your child's name, Brandy."

At this point, the fourth mother gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and whispers: "Come on Dick, we're leaving."

------------------------------------------------------------------

Teacher: "Why were you late?"

Pupil: "Sorry, I overslept."

Teacher: "You mean you need to sleep at home too!"

------------------------------------------------------------------

Father and son in supermarket.

"Dad, what are these?"

"That's a 3pack of condoms son for secondary school lads. 1 for Friday night, 1 for Saturday night and 1 for Sunday night."

"What about the 6pack dad?"

"Those are for University lads. 2 for Friday night, 2 for Satuday night and 2 for Sunday night."

"Well dad, what about the 12pack then?"

"Married men son. 1 for January, 1 for February, 1 for March ..."

------------------------------------------------------------------

100 people get the Swine Flu and everybody wants to wear a mask.

A million people have AIDS and no one wants to wear a condom!

------------------------------------------------------------------

One little girl takes a shower with her nan, points down and asked: "What's that?"

Nan says: "That's my beaver."

The next day the girl went to shower with her mum and points down and says: "I know what that is, it's your beaver."

Mum replies: "Oh yeah how do you know that?"

"Nan told me, but I think hers is dead because it's tongue is hanging out!"

------------------------------------------------------------------

A couple were married and, following the wedding, the husband laid down some rules.

"I'll be home when I want, if I want, and at what time I want," he insisted. "And, I don't expect any hassle from you. Also, I expect a decent meal to be on the table every evening, unless I tell you otherwise. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and card-playing with my buddies whenever I want. Those are my rules," he said. "Any comments?"

His new bride replied, "No, that's fine with me. But, just understand that there'll be sex here at seven o'clock every night ... whether you're here or not."

------------------------------------------------------------------

What is the difference between friends and best friends?

When you are in hospital, friends ask: "How are you?"

Best friends ask: "Hey brother, how is the nurse?"

Budget Wedding Cake

2009-02-08T02:05:00.000-08:00

Pomeranian Mei Tai

2009-02-06T22:11:00.000-08:00

Love is BLIND

2009-02-04T04:35:00.000-08:00

How to Impress a Woman/Man

2009-02-02T01:21:00.000-08:00

How to Impress a Woman:

compliment her,
kiss her,
caress her,
love her,
comfort her,
protect her,
hold her,
spend money on her,
wine & dine her,
listen to her,
stand by her,
support her,
go to the ends of the earth for her.

How to Impress a Man:

show up naked,
bring beer.

Gold plated Mercedes-Benz C63 AMG for the uber rich

2009-02-01T23:54:00.000-08:00

Spending a huge amount of money on a luxury car like a Mercedes and then adding thousands more on its beautification with a precious metal or gemstones is indeed a matter of concern that needs your attention. After the astounding Mercedes-Benz SLR painted in chrome, we bring you the jaw dropping luxury Mercedes-Benz C63 AMG all wrapped in gold that proved to be a real head-turner at the “Bling on Wheels Show” in Dubai. However, there is no word on what amount was thrashed on the car to get the paint job done, but the flashy gold-mirror finish will certainly make your eyes sore when you take a closer look on a sunny day.

Via:Autoblog

Couple gets their deceased pooch cloned for $155,000 from BornRich

2009-02-01T23:51:00.000-08:00

Earlier, we did a story on the dog cloning by a US Biotech firm, and now Nina and Edga Otto (an American couple) have struck the same chord by getting their pooch Lancelot cloned, which had died of cancer last year. The aggrieved couple decided to fill the desperate void by getting their beloved dog cloned in Korea for the huge amount of $155,000. The power of technology that revived the memories of the deceased dog can be realized at the house of Edga and Nina Otto, who had frozen his DNA sample after being diagnosed with cancer some six years back. The couple has named the cloned copy of the dog “Lancelot Encore.” Edga Otto says that the puppy, which is now 10 weeks old, took just a few hours to mingle with the other pets and now he leads nine other dogs in the house. The dog that looks like any other cute puppy resembles its forebear in all ways.

Via: Telegraph

2009 McDonald's Calender

2009-01-24T00:45:00.000-08:00

Sandar story

2009-01-22T06:33:00.000-08:00

Boss: Where were you born?
Sardar: India ..
Boss: which part?
Sardar: What 'which part'? Whole body was born in India .

2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1: What would you do if the bomb
explodes while fixing.
Sardar 2: Dont worry, I have one more.

Sardar: What is the name of your car?
Lady: I forgot the name, but is starts with 'T'.
Sardar: Oh, what a strange car, starts with Tea. All cars that I know start with petrol.

Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Sardar: Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.

Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken.
Sardar: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.

At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh!
Sardar: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying?

Sardar: U cheated me.
Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
Sardar: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says this is 'All India Radio! '

NOW THE LAST TWO ULTIMATE:
In an interview, Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Sardar: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. .....
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Sardar: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup...

Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
Sardar: An old king's skeleton.
Tourist: Who's that smaller skeleton next to it?
Sardar: That was same king's skeleton when he was a child.

2009-01-20T00:51:00.000-08:00

Letters to Bill Gate

2009-01-20T00:44:00.000-08:00

Letter is from Banta Singh of Punjab to Mr. Bill Gates of Microsoft
Subject: Problems with my new computer

Dear Mr. Bill Gates,
We have bought a computer for our home and we have found some problems, which I want to bring to your notice.

1. There is a button 'start' but there is no 'stop' button. We request you to check this.

2. We find there is 'Run' in the menu. One of my friends clicked 'run' he ran up to Amritsar ! So, we request you to change that to 'sit', so that we can click that by sitting.

3. One doubt is whether any 're-scooter' is available in system? I find only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home.

4. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost the door key and we tried a lot trace the key with this ' find' button, but was unable to trace. Please rectify this problem.

5.. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft sentence', so when you will provide that?

6. I brought computer, CPU, mouse and keyboard, but there is only one icon which shows 'MY Computer': when you will provide the remaining items?

7. It is surprising that windows says 'MY Pictures' but there is not even a single photo of mine. So when will you keep my photo in that.

8. There is 'MICROSOFT OFFICE' what about 'MICROSOFT HOME' since I use the PC at home only.

9. You provided 'My Recent Documents'. When you will provide 'My Past Documents'?

10. You provide 'My Network Places'. For God shake please do not provide 'My Secret Places'. I do not want to let my wife know where I go after my office hours.

Regards,
Banta

Last one from me to Mr Bill Gates :

Sir, how is it that your name is Gates but u are selling WINDOWS?

十句值得深思的话

2009-01-13T05:35:00.001-08:00

第一句

没有一个百分的
另一半
只有五十分的
两个人

第二句

付出真心
才会得到真心
却也可能伤得彻底

保持距离
就能保护自己
却也注定永远寂寞

第三句

通常愿意留下来跟你吵架的人
才是真正爱你的人

第四句

有时候不是对方不在乎你
而是你把对方看得太重

第五句

冷漠有时候并不是无情
只是一种避免被伤害的工具

第六句

如果我们之前有1000步的距离
你只要跨出第一步
我就会朝你的方向走其余的999步

第七句

为你的难过
而快乐的
是敌人

为你的快乐
而快乐的
是朋友

为你的难过
而难过的
就是那些该放进心里的人

第八句

就算是believe
中间也藏了一个lie

第九句

真正的好朋友
并不是在一起就有聊不完的话题

而是在一起时
就算不说话
也不会感到尴尬

第十句

朋友就是被你看透了
还能喜欢你的人

The Picture

2008-10-22T00:41:00.001-07:00

George had responded to a call from his attorney, insisting that they meet at once. He arrived at his lawyer's firm, and was ushered into his office.

"Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?" the lawyer asked.

"Well, if those are my choices, I guess I'll take the bad news first."

"Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars."

"That's the bad news?" George was stunned? "If you call that bad, I can't wait to hear the terrible news."

"The terrible news is that it's of you and your secretary."

Nine year old Junior

2008-10-22T00:40:00.001-07:00

Nine year old Junior comes home from school one day and his mother asks what he learned. "Oh, mom," said Junior, "I learned how to fuck today!" Mom is furious and sends him to his room explaining that he has to wait till his father gets home. Well, dad gets home about an hour later and is met by his irate wife. "Go talk to YOUR son!" she demands.

Dad goes up and finds his son sitting on the bed and asks what had happened. "Dad, all I told her is that I learned to fuck today," says Junior. "That's my boy!!!!!" dad blurts out, but after thinking a moment he says, "Well, your mom is really upset about this, so I'm gonna have to ground you for a week. But, I see you're following in your father's footsteps. I'm quite proud of you."

The next day at the construction site, dad is bragging to all his co-workers about his nine year old son getting laid. "A chip off the old block!" he beams . "Of course, I didn't start till I was ten, but he's already becoming a man!!"

Dad comes home from work that night, proud as can be, barely kisses the wife's cheek as he rushes up to his son's room. "Well, son," he asks, "did you do it again today???"

"Oh, no!" exclaims Junior, "my butt still hurts from yesterday!"

Potential Employee's Application

2008-10-22T00:26:00.001-07:00

A Manager of a retail clothing store is reviewing a potential employee's application and notices that the man has never worked in retail before. He says to the man, "For a man with no experience, you are certainly asking for a high wage."

"Well Sir," the applicant replies, "the work is so much harder when you don't know what you're doing!"

Imagination

2008-10-22T00:22:00.001-07:00

Several weeks after a young man had been hired, he was called into the personnel manager's office.

"What is the meaning of this?" the manager asked. "When you applied for the job, you told us you had 5 years' experience. Now we discover this is the first job you've ever had."

"Well," the young man said, "in your ad you said you wanted somebody with imagination."

Pain In the Back

2008-10-22T00:17:00.000-07:00

Paul and I were talking one day when Paul says, "I went to see the doctor the other day for that pain in my back."

"So what happened?" I asked.

"Well, he ran a bunch of tests, gave me some pills and sent me home. Told me to stay in bed for a week. He also told me to sit down whenever I had to pee. Can you imagine that? A grown man having to sit to pee?"

"Why would he want you to sit to pee?" I asked

"Well", said Paul, "With my bad back, he doesn't want me picking up anything too big."

男人不坏，女人不爱呀！

2008-10-08T19:05:00.000-07:00

男人不坏，女人不爱。这句话在现实中非常准确。虽然很多女人会矢口否认这一点甚至对此嗤之以鼻。但实际上，“坏”男人的求爱方式的确比好男人的方式有效得多。
坏男人的特点是：脸皮厚，大胆，善于撒谎，不太受道德约束，花招诡计多，一旦有机会“日”后再说，不负责任。而这些特点恰恰击中了女人的软肋。
假设硬件条件相似的好男人和坏男人遇到同一个女人，坏男人的杀伤力要强出n倍。
好男人的出手概率要小得多，因为好男人开始追求之前就要考虑负责任的问题，所以不完全中意的不会去追，条件不成熟的目前不能追，对方已有男友的不能追，未来前景不看好（例：在不同城市）的不能追，限制极多。而坏男人反正也没打算负责任，只要对方有点姿色，或是触手可得，一概先追了再说。

好男人诚实，没钱没关系就实话实说，对女方的缺点也坦诚相告，往往让女人很失望。而坏男人随便编两个故事就可以显得自己实力超群；对女人花言巧语又很容易让她们心花怒放，认为找到了知己伯乐。在这个浮躁的社会背景下，好男人多年的辛苦努力换来的成果多半还不如一个坏男人用3分钟时间编出来的故事更能让女人心动。

好男人总想着尊重对方，不会找机会调戏非礼。而坏男人通过调笑、酒精、跳舞等方式随时刺激女人的荷尔蒙，一有机会就把对方占为己有。女人的快感一旦被调动起来，反而很快会爱上这个男人。坏男人一次嘿咻的效果往往超过好男人默默的多次付出。有些傻女人认为男人上了她就是爱上了她；更傻的女人认为一旦被男人上了，她就必须爱上这个男人。女人的本性中隐含着逆来顺受的基因。

好男人真心付出，把双方的感情看得很重，心态容易不平衡，为一些小事和女友争吵。而坏男人心想：反正我不过是做一场游戏，找点刺激罢了，哄哄她得了，生个什么气啊？心态更平和，反而显得成熟个性好。

坏男人的约会经验通常比好男人多得多。参照第一条，坏男人一有机会就出手，即使不成功也积累了经验，逐渐了解了女人的心理。女人大多不理智，有种种莫名其妙完全不合逻辑的偏见（比如：一个鞋上有污点的男人一定靠不住）。坏男人通过大量的实战经验在约会时把这些表面工作做得很好，而好男人却懵然不知，被唰了都不明白为什么，还以为是自己实力不够。

双方发生争执时，好男人自尊心、原则性强，不会轻易迁就对方，往往为些小事谁都不让步，最后只能分手。而坏男人脸皮厚，认个错比喝稀饭都容易，往往轻而易举就能哄得对方回心转意；当然，那是在他还没有玩腻的时候，否则即使女方让步他也能找出借口分手，有时候女人反而会一再让步，彻底沦为坏男人的玩物。

See more:http://ks.cn.yahoo.com

joke

2008-04-27T21:50:00.001-07:00

1. Losing all your friends
Man comes home, finds his wife with his friend in bed .
He shoots his friend and kills him.
Wife says 'If you behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends.'

2. Brother wanted
A small boy wrote to Santa Claus,'send me a brother'...
Santa wrote back, 'SEND ME YOUR MOTHER'....

3. Meaning of WIFE
Husband asks, 'Do you know the meaning of WIFE? It means 'Without Information

Fighting Everytime'!'
Wife replies, 'No, it means 'With Idiot For Ever'!!!'

4. Importance of a period
Teacher: 'Do you know the importance of a period?'
Kid: 'Yeah, once my sister said she has missed one, my mom fainted, dad got a

heart attack & our driver ran away.'

5. Confident vs. confidential
A young boy asks his Dad, 'What is the difference between confident and

confidential?'
Dad says, 'You are my son, I'm confident about that. Your friend over there, is also

my son, that's confidential!'

6. Anger management?
Husband: 'When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your

anger?'
Wife: 'I clean the toilet.'
Husband: 'How does that help?'
Wife: 'I use your toothbrush.'

Chinese jokes (18+)

2008-04-26T18:54:00.000-07:00

1. 某工场主人以小气刻薄而远近驰名。有天晚上，他和老婆躺在床上亲热，他握著她的乳房感叹的说:『唉~~要是你这里会流牛奶就好了，我们就不用养那堋多乳牛了。』老婆听了非常的生气。过会儿，他又捏捏她的屁股感概的说:『唉~~要是你这里会生蛋就好了，那我们就不用养那堋多鸡了!』老婆气的半死，用力一抓她老公那话儿，也叹气的说:『唉~~要是你这话儿会硬就好了。』老公很奇怪，问:『为什堋?』老婆说:『那我们不用请那么多工人了』

2. 飞机起飞后，机长向乘客讲话，讲完后，竟忘了将话筒关上。他对副驾驶说：“我要先去大便，然后再去干那个新来的空姐。” 　　那个空姐听到了，急忙从走道走过去，想告诉他话筒忘了关了，但走的时候，不小心一个屁股蹲儿摔倒在走道上，旁边的一位老太太低头对她说：“不用著急，宝贝，他说他要先拉大便的。”

3. 女孩座在凳子上，起来的时候，一个人看到这个女孩的裙子掖在了屁股里，就伸手把裙子拽了出来，这个女孩大怒，打了这个人一巴掌，这个人委屈的说：算我多事。接着又伸手把裙子重新塞到了女孩的屁股里。

Our daily chicken

2008-04-26T18:45:00.001-07:00

A salesman from KFC walked up to the Pope and offers him a million dollars if he would change "The Lord's Prayer" from "give us this day our daily bread" to "give us this day our daily chicken." The Pope refused his offer.

Two weeks later, the man offered the pope 10 million dollars to change it from "give us this day our daily bread" to "give us this day our daily chicken" and again the Pope refused the man's generous offer. Another week later, the man offered the Pope 20 million dollars and finally the Pope accepted. The following day, the Pope said to all his officials, "I have some good news and some bad news. 'The good news is, that we have just received a check for 20 million dollars. The bad news is, we lost the Wonder Bread account!'''

A mental hospital

2008-04-26T18:44:00.001-07:00

After hearing that one of the patients in a mental hospital had saved another from a suicide attempt by pulling him out of a bathtub, the hospital director reviewed the rescuer's file and called him into his office.

"Mr. Haroldson, your records and your heroic behavior indicate that you're ready to go home. I'm only sorry that the man you saved later killed himself with a rope around the neck."

"Oh, he didn't kill himself," Mr. Haroldson replied. "I hung him up to dry."

Scared sleeping

2008-04-26T18:42:00.000-07:00

Shakey went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I've got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there's somebody under it. I get under the bed, I think there's somebody on top of it. Top, under, top, under. "you gotta help me, I'm going crazy!"

"Just put yourself in my hands for two years," said the shrink. "Come to me three times a week, and I'll cure your fears."

"How much do you charge?"

"A hundred dollars per visit."

"I'll sleep on it," said Shakey.

Six months later the doctor met Shakey on the street. "Why didn't you ever

come to see me again?" asked the psychiatrist.

"For a hundred buck's a visit? A bartender cured me for ten dollars."

"Is that so! How?"

"He told me to cut the legs off the bed!"

Pay for your past bills

2008-04-25T06:47:00.000-07:00

A customer sent an order to a distributor for a large amount of goods totaling a great deal of money.

The distributor noticed that the previous bill hadn't been paid. The collections manager left a voice-mail for them saying, "We can't ship your new order until you pay for the last one."

The next day the collections manager received a collect phone call, "Please cancel the order. We can't wait that long."

Application rejections

2008-04-24T00:26:00.000-07:00

Baxter Conners
Vice President
Company 203
203 Wall St.
New York, NY 10015

Dear Mr. Conners,

Thank you for your letter of February 17th. After careful consideration I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me employment with your bank.

This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field of candidates it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.

Despite Company 203's outstanding qualifications and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs at this time. Therefore I will initiate employment with your firm immediately following graduation. I look forward to seeing you then.

Sincerely,
XXXXXXXX

A mental hospital

2008-04-23T07:14:00.000-07:00

Crazy people talk

2008-04-21T06:34:00.001-07:00

A doctor of psychology was doing his normal morning rounds when he entered a patient's room. He found Patient #1 sitting on the floor, pretending to saw a piece of wood in half.

Patient #2 was hanging from the ceiling, by his feet.

The doctor asked patient number 1 what he was doing. The patient replied, "Can't you see I'm sawing this piece of wood in half?" The doctor inquired of Patient #1 what Patient #2 was doing. Patient #1 replied, "Oh. He's my friend, but he's a little crazy. He thinks he's a lightbulb." The doctor looks up and notices Patient #2's face is going all red.

The doctor asks Patient #1, "If he's your friend, you should get him down from there before he hurts himself"

Patient #1 replies, "What? And work in the dark?"

Passing an exam

2008-04-21T06:30:00.000-07:00

Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist. If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for five years.

The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board looking over an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump.

The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms.

Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs.

The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump. "Congratulations! You're a free man. Just tell me why didn't you jump?" asked the doctor.

To which the third patient answered, "Well Doc, I can't swim!"

cartoon

2008-04-19T20:15:00.000-07:00

Boy & his mom (18+)

2008-04-13T06:27:00.001-07:00

A boy told his mom, "I couldn't sleep last night so I went into your room. Why were you jumping up and down on daddy?"

His mom said, "Well dear, I was pushing the air out of him."

The boy replied, "Oh then you're wasting your time. The lady next door blows him back up every day."

Helisoft

2008-04-13T06:26:00.001-07:00

A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment.

Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position. The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, and held up a handwritten sign that said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER."

The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely. After they were on the ground, the copilot asked the pilot how he had done it.

"I knew it had to be the Microsoft Building, because they gave me a technically correct but completely useless answer."

Joke (18+)

2008-04-11T05:42:00.000-07:00

欲望超级强的女人

有一女进性用品商店，要买一支振动棒，老板说：“都在上面，自己选”，女认真选后说：“我就要那个红色的！”，老板看了一眼说：“小姐，那是灭火器！”

男女ML,女总疯狂地叫,邻居敲门抗议!男说快别出声,女答可以.随后女便双目紧闭,牙关紧咬,浑身发抖. 男的慌问咋啦?女答:没事接着干,我改震动了!

在一个偏远的山区.有一水性扬花的女人, 结婚以后,见丈夫外出做生意,便与情人在家中偷情.事到一半时,听到屋外传来脚步声,女人慌忙取来羊皮大衣让情妇披上.到后院羊圈里面躲躲,丈夫回家便拉过女人欲行房事.女人不答应.丈夫忍耐不住.便到后院羊圈拉过一只羊,一番云雨过后.男人满意的回房睡觉.到半夜,男人又去和那羊云雨了一番,早晨起来, 男人想起昨晚那只羊,觉得羊别有一番情趣,便又到羊圈抓过那只羊,准备行房事.突然那羊站起身来,大声说,你他妈的是不是有病啊.羊圈里就我这一只羊吗?

有对夫妻，妻子病了，去看医生，医生说这得了这病后行房事可能会有生命危险，那天回去后就和丈夫分屋睡，可是没过两天，晚上妻子去敲丈夫屋的门，丈夫问谁啊，妻子回答：“不怕死的。”

在香港有个女孩路过一个算命的摊子
算命的拉住女孩对他说“你有凶兆，会对你不利”
女孩说到“不利脱了就好啦”说完转身要走
那算命的对女孩又说到“就算你逃脱了，也躲不过人生的两个大波”

有一个修女到神父那里忏悔：“神父，请您原谅我，我昨天辱骂了一个男人。”
神父：“你骂他什么？”
修女：“我骂他‘你妈了个*’。”
神父：“你为什么要骂他呢，告诉我，我会请求上帝原谅你的。”
修女：“她摸我的胸部。”
神父把手伸进了修女的胸部）：“是这样吗？”
修女：“是的。”
神父：“即使他摸了你的胸，你也不应该骂他啊。”
修女：“可是他又接着往下摸我。”
神父往下摸修女）：“是这样吗？”
修女：“是的。”
神父：“即使他摸了你，你也不应该骂他啊。”
修女：“可是他又接着把我摁到地上，把我qj了。”
神父把修女摁到地上，qj了修女......）：“是这样吗？”
修女：“是的。”
神父：“即使他qj了你，你也不应该骂他啊。”
修女：“可是完事后他告诉我他有爱滋病。”
............
神父：“你妈了个*！”

色鬼的交易 (18+)

2008-04-10T23:14:00.000-07:00

埃迪迷上了一位漂亮性感的同事，多次提出做爱的想法，可这位小姐总是托词和别人有约会，予以拒绝。这天，埃迪欲火中烧，实在是忍无可忍。他对她说：“我给您100美元，如果您同意做爱的话……”

她盯着他，说：“不。”埃迪说：“我会很快的。我把钱扔到地板上，您弯腰去拾。我会在您把钱拾起时做完的。”

她想了一会儿，说要和男朋友商量一下。说着，她拿出手机打通了男朋友的电话，讲了埃迪的提议，征求他的意见。她的男朋友说：“向他要200美元。你拾钱的时候尽可能快着点儿，我猜他的短裤都还来不及脱下来呢。”

她表示赞同，接受了这个提议。半个小时过去了，男朋友还一直在等女朋友的电话。最后，大约45分钟时，男朋友焦急地打来电话，问出了什么事……？”

女友大口喘着粗气，她断续地回答道：“这个杂种……撒……撒……撒的都是些硬币！”

好男人与坏男人的区别

2008-04-05T19:51:00.000-07:00

在爱情上好男人与坏男人的区别男人不坏，女人不爱。这句话在现实中非常准确。虽然很多女人会矢口否认这一点甚至对此嗤之以鼻。但实际上，“坏”男人的求爱方式的确比好男人的方式有效得多。坏男人的特点是：脸皮厚，大胆，善于撒谎，不太受道德约束，花招诡计多，一旦有机会“日”后再说，不负责任。而这些特点恰恰击中了女人的软肋。假设硬件条件相似的好男人和坏男人遇到同一个女人，坏男人的杀伤力要强出n倍。首先好男人的出手概率要小得多，因为好男人开始追求之前就要考虑负责任的问题，所以不完全中意的不会去追，条件不成熟的目前不能追，对方已有男友的不能追，未来前景不看好（例：在不同城市）的不能追，限制极多。而坏男人反正也没打算负责任，只要对方有点姿色，或是触手可得，一概先追了再说。...

第二
好男人诚实，没钱没关系就实话实说，对女方的缺点也坦诚相告，往往让女人很失望。而坏男人随便编两个故事就可以显得自己实力超群；对女人花言巧语又很容易让她们心花怒放，认为找到了知己伯乐。在这个浮躁的社会背景下，好男人多年的辛苦努力换来的成果多半还不如一个坏男人用3分钟时间编出来的故事更能让女人心动。...

第三
好男人总想着尊重对方，不会找机会调戏非礼。而坏男人通过调笑、酒精、跳舞等方式随时刺激女人的荷尔蒙，一有机会就把对方占为己有。女人的快感一旦被调动起来，反而很快会爱上这个男人。坏男人一次嘿咻的效果往往超过好男人默默的多次付出。有些傻女人认为男人上了她就是爱上了她；更傻的女人认为一旦被男人上了，她就必须爱上这个男人。女人的本性中隐含着逆来顺受的基因。...

第四
好男人真心付出，把双方的感情看得很重，心态容易不平衡，为一些小事和女友争吵。而坏男人心想：反正我不过是做一场游戏，找点刺激罢了，哄哄她得了，生个什么气啊？心态更平和，反而显得成熟个性好。...

第五
坏男人的约会经验通常比好男人多得多。参照第一条，坏男人一有机会就出手，即使不成功也积累了经验，逐渐了解了女人的心理。女人大多不理智，有种种莫名其妙完全不合逻辑的偏见（比如：一个鞋上有污点的男人一定靠不住）。坏男人通过大量的实战经验在约会时把这些表面工作做得很好，而好男人却懵然不知，被唰了都不明白为什么，还以为是自己实力不够。...

第六
双方发生争执时，好男人自尊心、原则性强，不会轻易迁就对方，往往为些小事谁都不让步，最后只能分手。而坏男人脸皮厚，认个错比喝稀饭都容易，往往轻而易举就能哄得对方回心转意；当然，那是在他还没有玩腻的时候，否则即使女方让步他也能找出借口分手，有时候女人反而会一再让步，彻底沦为坏男人的玩物。...

女人要不起的13类男人

2008-04-01T04:29:00.000-07:00

1、非常酷、非常深沉的男人

他们经常是一副莫名痛苦的模样，愤世嫉俗。这种男人是要不得的，事实上他们生活在自以为是的悲惨世界里，痛苦得死去活来，追求一种永远也得不到的境界。他们与女人相处的时候，总是若即若离，使女人痛苦不堪。他们善于欺骗向往爱得轰轰烈烈的女人，可是，这种爱情仅仅是昙花一现。

2、过分追求事业的男人

有事业有地位的男人是最受女人青睐的。可是如果过分看重事业的男人，往往会牺牲个人情感，而选择那些能够在金钱、权势和能力等方面助他们一臂之力的女人。这种过分追求事业的男人的择偶是有条件的，因而不是真正能够患难与共的伴侣。

3、“浪子”型的男人

他们交际很广，从来都没有打算一辈子厮守着一个女人。可是“男人不坏、女人不爱”，许多不信邪的女人往往跃跃欲试，想用真情或者纯情去捆住他们，这只不过是一厢情愿的做法。

4、大男子主义者的男人

他们喜欢呼喝，一副“大丈夫何患无妻”的模样。这种男人如果是表面上这样，而你的确爱他，那就迁就维护一下他的尊严吧；如果骨子里也是如此，那么做他的妻子就惨了。

5、油腔滑调的男人

这种男人甜言蜜语，虚伪地恭维每一个女人，使人浑身起鸡皮疙瘩，没有一点诚意。可是，许多女孩就喜欢这一套，被灌得迷糊了，还在偷偷地沾沾自喜。与这种男人平时应酬应酬，做朋友还不错，如果把他们的话太当真可就糟了。

6、有很多女性朋友的男人

他们对每一个女人都非常关照，就像一个大好人。男女之间是不是有真正的友谊还需要探讨，但若他对每一个红颜知己或者好妹妹都事无巨细地照顾，无疑会没有更多的闲暇顾及你。不信，你试试就知道了。

7、太注意自己形象的男人

穿着隆重得体，出门以前总是梳三次头再照三次镜子。表面上他是为了取悦女人，其实他最关心的人是他自己，而且十分自私，很少会顾及到女人的感受。

8、有恋母情结并且女性化的男人

这种男人在幼时和母亲接触太多或者是太缺乏父爱了，故在长大成人后什么事都依靠母亲，他们缺乏独立的意识，应变能力很差，做事没有充足的信心。因为过于恋母，他们的行为与心理都变得女性化，这从他们的外表与喜好就可以看出来。比如，他们喜欢穿质地柔软的羊绒织物，爱窃窃私语，厌恶运动，爱收看电视连续剧。和这种缺乏男子汉气概的男性交往，你不仅感觉他不像男人，也会觉得你越来越不像女人了。

9、志大而才疏的男人

这种男人好高骛远，追求完美的生活和成功的事业。所以他们按照社会的期望把自己的生活安排得很满，工作、交友和娱乐活动都不曾错过，并且都想赶在潮流的最前沿。而往往他们缺乏内涵，没有真才实学，因此才让许多事情来充塞时间，给你一种成功男士的假相。你如果和他在一起生活，时间一长就会发现他只是一个假好男人，这种男人一生都不会有什么出息。

10、不修边幅的艺术家

这种男人非常有才华，他们具有丰富的想像力，往往成为令众人仰慕的艺术家。他们觉得自己独一无二，行动与思想都非常另类。但是他们却不太注意外表，或许想体现自己的与众不同，留着长发，衣服也很破烂，很长时间不洗澡的样子；并且他们太陶醉于艺术创作之中，很容易忽略你的存在。和他生活在一起，你往往感到这并非真正的生活，你根本不能接受他的想法，你更无力去改变他。

11、急于结婚的男人

这种男人往往和你约会几天、甚至数个小时以后便会向你求婚。刚开始的时候，他会表现得非常绅士、非常浪漫，他会与你在沙滩上漫步，送你一束鲜花，替你预备晚餐，甜言蜜语地说“我爱你”。可是如果你真的嫁给了他，就会发现他所做的一切全是表面化的。结婚以后，他马上会完全改变，总是挑剔，喜怒无常，并且他从不认为自己有错。因此，对于这种男人应该趁早避开，特别是经过多次婚姻的男人。

12、金钱至上的有钱男人

他们什么事都以金钱为第一，似乎有钱就有了一切，物质上全都满足了，精神上却是十分空虚的。和这种男人在一起，女人往往会变成傻子。她的精神也十分空虚，喜欢把自己的物质条件向其他女人炫耀。

13、心理不健全的男人

心理不健全的男人绝不要妄加选择，与他们一起生活非常痛苦。常见的心理不健全的男人有以下几种：

　　(1)心胸狭窄：不准妻子和其他男人稍有接触。

　　(2)心理阴暗：为了达到目的，往往使用卑劣手段却不以为耻。

　　(3)胆小懦弱：无所作为，被别人看不起。

　　(4)酗酒赌博：没有理智，容易被别人或者环境摆布，对妻子缺乏温存。

女人以身相许的九大误区

2008-04-01T04:27:00.000-07:00

1.感激男友对自己的倾慕爱恋之情

虽然她们也懂得女子贞操十分重要，但在男友倾慕爱恋之情的不断激荡下，便坚守不住防线。当男友提出性要求时，担心拒绝会伤害他的心，于是把满足男友的性要求当做回报。这类情况在调查中占18.3％。过村没有这店之感触，在恋爱过程中表现主动。然而，对于有些男子来讲，女方越主动，他反而自视越高甚至产生对女方不放心的担忧感。为了表示自己的真诚，有的女子便急匆匆以身相许。

2.使爱情关系升级

许多女青年把“性”作为衡量爱情的尺码，认为只有性方能维持爱情、发展爱情。在这种性爱观念的支配下，她们过快地献出了自己的全部。

3.了解男友的性功能

研究指出，这类动机多见于大龄未婚者。她们深感择偶之不易，也期望婚后能美满幸福，因而对结婚持慎重态度。她们愿意与自己满意的恋人在婚前性交，以了解对方的性功能。

4.维持婚约的关系

北京的一项调查表明，在发生婚前性行为的青年男女中，有90.7％是明确婚约关系，但因种种缘故，如无住房、经济困难、工作不在一起、不到法定的最低婚龄等，迟迟不能结婚。为了维持这种婚约关系，双方经常发生性行为。

5.抗拒环境阻力

恋爱中的青年男女，当经过一番了解确定下爱情关系后，总希望得到周围环境中的人、特别是父母亲朋的支持和赞许。但如果遭到意外的粗暴干涉，他们不但不终止恋爱关系，反而更热情、更密切，以“生米煮成熟饭”的既成事实来抗拒这些阻力。

6.虚荣心作祟

部分女青年虚荣心极强，其“恋爱”标准趋于“郎财女貌”。于拭，有的女子为了满足自己的虚荣心，不惜以肉体换取财物，很快献出了女性“第一次”，也有的在金钱的诱惑下，“爱情”不断地转移，导致“来历不清”的怀孕。

7.追求所谓“新”的恋爱方式

有些青年错误地认为，90年代的恋爱方式就是动辄发生性关系。在追新潮的心理支配下，她们很快从初恋进入到热恋，由边缘性性行为上升到核心性性行为。有一项调查发现，44.67％的女性在半年之内发生了多次性关系，其中50.33％的人表示愿意，80.33％的人认为这是个人的事。

8.祟尚种种性自由观念

近几年来，有些青年人盲目祟尚西方的种种性自由观念，想冲破所谓传统性道德观念的自我意识非常强烈。在调查中，有32.67％的女性认为“贞操不很重要”，有19.7％的女性性交后根本无所谓，并说“就那么回事”等等。观念一变，行为随之而变，当她们的爱情还处于不知道如何理智地去驾驭生活之舟时，就被欲火烧得不攻自破，发生了不该过早发生的性行为。

有的和男友周期性地发生关系，有的虽已预感到两人不可能最终成婚，但那种特殊的关系仍一如既往。扭曲的性观念使扭曲的性行为一发而不可收拾。

9.性已渐渐撕去了遮遮掩掩的面纱

对于有些女青年来说，已不是“谈性色变”，羞于启齿，而是谈性欲如同谈食欲似的轻松、正常。但由于许多书籍刊物偏重于器官、性生活内容的介绍，性心理、性道德教育贫乏，加之影视中性审美镜头的增多，以及马路、大街上楼腰搭肩，抑或拥抱、接吻现象时时会映入眼帘，这种文化氛围使少女时期对性的蒙胧意识和好奇心理，更加深化与现实化。她们要亲自去尝试、探秘，以至于在恋爱期间，有时主动好奇地提出或不拒绝男方提出的性要求。调查表明，有64.3％的女性一时好奇冲动发生了性关系，直到怀孕不得不流产时才后悔莫及。

Source: internet :P

GOOD FACTS (JUST AS A FUN )

2008-03-31T02:24:00.000-07:00

UST HAVE A FUN OF THE MESSAGE OR ANALYSIS ON IT ...

Men:
************

1. All men are extremely busy.
************

2. Although they are so busy, they still have time for women.
************

3. Although they have time for women, they don't really care for them.
************

4. Although they don't really care for them, they always have one around.
************

5. Although they always have one around them, they always try their luck with others.
************

6. Although they try their luck with others, they get really pissed off if the woman leaves them.
************

7. Although the woman leaves them they still don't learn from their mistakes and still try their luck with others.
************

Women:
************

1. The most important thing for a woman is financial security.
************

2. Although this is so important, they still go out and buy expensive clothes and stuff.
************

3.. Although they always buy expensive clothes, they never have something to wear.
************

4. Although they never have something to wear, they always dress beautifully.
************

5. Although they always dress beautifully, their clothes are always just "an old rag".
************

6. Although their clothes are always "just an old rag", they still expect you to compliment them.
************

7. Although they expect you to compliment them, when you do, they don't believe you.
************

Source: email

Don't cheat the kids

2008-03-27T19:57:00.001-07:00

One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother has several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, “Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?” Her mother replied, “Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.” The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, “Momma, how come ALL of grandma’s hairs are white?”

about love ...

2008-03-26T00:54:00.000-07:00

Source: email

Gtalk Tips n shortcuts (may be u know this)

2008-03-19T22:26:00.000-07:00

Shortcuts

* CTRL + Mousewheel up/down over input textbox: Change the font size of the textbox.
* F9: Open Gmail to send an email to your friend
* F11: Start a call with your friend
* F12: Stop the current call
* ESC: Close the current window
* ALT + ESC: Minimize the current window
* TAB: Switch between multiple chat windows
* CTRL + I: Same as TAB
* SHIFT + TAB: Same as TAB but in reverse order
* CTRL + TAB: Same as SHIFT + TAB
* Windows + ESC: Open Google Talk (if it's minimized, or in the tray)

Conversation Text

* A message can be 32767 characters long.
* Certain smileys are recognized by Google Talk and will be shown in blue.
:-| :-O :-x :-P :-D ;-) :-( :| :O :x :P :D :) :( ;-| ;-O ;-x ;-P ;-D ;-) ;-( ;| ;O ;x ;P ;D ;) ;( B-| B-O B-x B-P B-D B-) B-( B'( BO Bx BD B) B( B) And you can put a ' between the characters to get another one shown in blue.
* To write text in bold, put it between *asteriks*
* To write text in italic, put it between _underscores_
* You can insert special characters like ??? with 'Start / Programs / Accessories / System Tools / Character Maps'.

Conversation Window

* Drag a conversation window on top of another and they will dock together.
* Drag a file onto the chat history and you'll send the file to the selected contact.
* When you see a message notification, you can right click it to close it without focusing the conversation window.

Conference Calls

* What you need to do to have conference calls: Open up a copy of Google Talk on all computers with which you wish to conference. After one copy is opened make a new shortcut for Google Talk but at the end of it add /nomutex. If you installed it to the default folder then your shortcut should read "C:\Program Files\Google\Google Talk\googletalk.exe" /nomutex. Open 2 instances of the software on every user's computer. After this start a chain: User 1 should connect on one instance to user 2. User 2 will connect on his second instance to user 3. User 3 will connect using his second instance back to user 1. With this chain everyone is connected to everyone.

Nickname & Status Message

* You can change your name in the Google Account page.
or To change the nickname need to go to your Gmail account and change the name there. Choose Settings, Accounts, and then Edit info. Click on the second radio button, and enter your custom name.
As a result all of your emails will have that nick as well, there is no way to seperate the two.
* You can add a website in your custom message, it will be clickable when someone opens a conversation window with you.

Contacts

* You don’t need to say Yes or No when someone wants to add you as a friend; you can simply ignore it, the request will go away. (On the other hand, someone with whom you chat often will automatically turn to be your friend, unless you disable this).
* The Gmail account 'user@gmail.com' can't be invited as your friend.

Sound & Video

* It's possible to broadcast music, MP3, etc.. through Google Talk.
Unplug your microphone. Double click on the speaker icon in the lower right corner. This will open
up "Volume Control". Select "Options" and then "Properties". Then check the button
next to "Recording" then click OK. You may also have to change your setting under
Mixer Device. Now the Recording Control screen should be up. On my computer I selected "Wave Out Mix". Click on the green phone in Google Talk and call your friend.

Secret Startup Parameters

* /nomutex: allows you to open more than one instance of Google Talk
* /autostart: when Google Talk is run with this parameter, it will check the registry settings to see if it needs to be started or not. If the "Start automatically with Windows" option is unchecked, it won't start.
* /forcestart: same as /autostart, but forces it to start no matter what option was set.
* /S upgrade: Used when upgrading Google Talk
* /register: registers Google Talk in the registry, includig the GMail Compose method.
* /checkupdate: check for newer versions
* /plaintextauth: uses plain authentication mechanism instead then Google's GAIA mechanism. Used for testing the plain method on Google's servers.
* /nogaiaauth: disables GAIA authentication method. The same as above.
* /factoryreset: set settings back to default.
* /gaiaserver servername.com: uses a different GAIA server to connect to Google Talk. Used for debug purposes only, there are no other known GAIA servers.
* /mailto email@host.com: send an email with Gmail
* /diag: start Google Talk in diagnostic mode
* /log: probably has something to do with the diagnostic logging
* /unregister: ?
* /embedding: ?

Others

* If there’s something you think is missing in Google Talk, send off a message to Google.
* There was a hidden game in Google Talk. In the about screen you could see 'play 23 21 13 16 21 19 . 7 1 13 5'. Each number represented a letter. a=1, b=2, c=3 .... When you translated this message it said: 'play wumpus.game'. To play this game you had to invite wumpus.game@gmail.com as a friend. wumpus.game@gmail.com is always offline now. You can still play Hunt the Wumpus here.
* Google Talk can dock into the Google Desktop Sidebar. Doubleclick on the titlebar in the Google Talk main window and it docks as a panel into the GDS and slides out when you click the top of the docked panel.

Under the influence

2008-03-18T18:54:00.001-07:00

A guy walks into a bar, sits down and has a drink. Suddenly, a man hollers at him, ''I screwed your mom last night!'' Disturbed, the man tries to ignore him.

Again, he hears, ''Your mom was good in bed last night!'' Again, he tries to ignore it.

The man is just about to speak again but the guy stops him and says, ''Dad, go home, you're drunk!''

Little Nancy's pet

2008-03-18T18:52:00.000-07:00

Little Nancy was in the garden filling in a hole when her neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the little girl was up to, he politely asked, "What are you up to there, Nancy?"

"My goldfish died," replied Nancy tearfully, without looking up, "and I've just buried him."

The neighbor was concerned, "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?"

Nancy patted down the last heap of earth and then replied, "That's because he's inside your stupid cat."

Next Time You Think Life is Hard...Think Again! (传说中的人棍)

2008-03-10T05:36:00.000-07:00

Next Time You Think Life is Hard...Think Again!
Video here : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vY5Uo1PfZuY

I have a passion for reaching out to youth and keep myself available for whatever God wants me to do, and wherever He leads, I follow.
Writing several best-selling books has been one of my dreams and I hope to finish writing my first by the end of the year.

I know that there is no such thing as luck, chance or coincidence that these 'bad' things happen in our life.
I had complete peace knowing that God won't let anything happen to us in our life unless God has a good purpose for it all
I am now twenty-three years old and have completed a Bachelor of Commerce majoring in Financial Planning and Accounting. I am also a motivational speaker and love to go out and share my story and testimony wherever opportunities become available. I have developed talks to relate to and encourage students through topics that challenge today's teenagers. I am also a speaker in the corporate sector.

It will be called 'No Arms, No Legs, No Worries!'

I believe that if you have the desire and passion to do something, and if it's God's will, you will achieve it in good time. As humans, we continually put limits on ourselves for no reason at all! What's worse is putting limits on God who can do all things. We put God in a 'box'. The awesome thing about the Power of God, is that if we want to do something for God, instead of focusing on our capability, concentrate on our availability for we know that it is God through us and we
can't do anything without God. Once we make ourselves available for God's work, guess whose capabilities we rely on? God's!

Remember: WHEN YOU'RE BUSY JUDGING PEOPLE, YOU HAVE NO TIME TO LOVE THEM

Solar Powered Notebook with GPS & Satellite Phone

2008-03-07T00:42:00.001-08:00

We just told you about designer Nikola Knezevic’s Carbon Fibre Briefcase and we just spotted this Solar Powered Notebook Concept from him over at Tuvie. This solar powered laptop features powerful batteries that are recharged by wide Solar Panel attached to the computer. The solar laptop is also equipped with satellite link GPS, internet access, and satellite telephone which makes this device not only power independent but also universal tool for communication and exchange information literally from any spot on the planet as Tuvie guys puts it. The solar panels are detachable. We have earlier also seen one such solar-powered laptop concept from MSI (though strictly not impressive as this one) earlier. So, let’s hope this one turns real!

24 Karat Gold Custom Sneakers

2008-03-06T01:21:00.001-08:00

“A man is known by the shoes he wears”, and so I guess applies equally to the women. Last time, we told you about diamond-studded Nike sneakers and this time the footwear adorns gold with these 24 Karat Gold Custom Air Force sneakers that were commissioned by a husband as a gift for his loving wife. The gold sneakers feature her name and initials, along with golden Swooshes and swirling flourishes. These custom made sneakers were painstakingly gilded in genuine 24 karat gold to produce the perfect gift for her birthday. A stylized emblem was created from her initials (R.R.) and gilded in place at the rear of the shoe; her first name was placed on the other side. Golden laces were used to accent the design. Now, if you think the gold sneakers are just perfect for the love of your life, you know where to get them commissioned..right!

The devoted wife

2008-03-05T01:19:00.001-08:00

A devoted wife had spent her lifetime taking care of her husband. Now he had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to his senses, he motioned for her to come near him.

As she sat by him, he said, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. You know what?"

"What, my dear?" she asked gently.

"You're a goddamn jinx!"

Respectfully Cheating (joke 18+)

2008-03-05T01:16:00.000-08:00

Jack and Betty are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary.

"Betty, I was wondering -- have you ever cheated on me?"

"Oh Jack, why would you ask such a question now? You don't want to ask that question..."

"Yes, Betty, I really want to know. Please."

"Well, all right. Yes, 3 times."

"Three? When were they?"

"Well, Jack, remember when you were 35 years old and you really wanted to start the business on your own and no bank would give you a loan? Remember how one day the bank president himself came over to the house and signed the loan papers, no questions asked?"

"Oh, Betty, you did that for me! I respect you even more than ever, that you would do such a thing for me! So, when was number 2?"

"Well, Jack, remember when you had that last heart attack and you were needing that very tricky operation, and no surgeon would touch you? Remember how Dr. DeBakey came all the way up here, to do the surgery himself, and then you were in good shape again?"

"I can't believe it! Betty, I love that you should do such a thing for me, to save my life! I couldn't have a more wonderful wife. To do such a thing, you must really love me darling. I couldn't be more moved. When was number 3?"

"Well, Jack, remember a few years ago, when you really wanted to be president of the golf club and you were 17 votes short?"

few words that i like

2008-03-01T07:43:00.000-08:00

前生無望，今世無緣，來世神傷。總是牽腸掛肚。無情又何必，多情又何妨，人生一世，百年滄桑。
我将于茫茫人海中寻访我唯一的灵魂伴侣，得之，我幸。不得，我命，如此而已。。爱过，挣扎过，活过。

叶子的离开
是风儿的追求
还是树儿的不再挽留？……

大多数20多岁的男人处于他一生中最暗淡的时刻,没有事业.没有钱.20多岁的女人正处于她一生中最光彩的时刻,她年轻,她漂亮,所以20多岁的男人更应该珍惜在这个时候爱他的女人.因为她是用她一生中最光彩的时刻来陪伴你一生中最暗淡的时刻

命运负责洗牌，但玩牌的是我们自己。

今天我发现：为什么我们总是觉得痛苦大于快乐；忧伤大于欢喜；悲哀大于幸福。原来是因为我们总是把不属于痛苦的东西当作痛苦；把不属于忧伤的东西当作忧伤；把不属于悲哀的东西当作悲哀；而把原本该属于快乐、欢喜、幸福的东西看得很平淡，没有把他们当作真正的快乐、欢喜和幸福。

有些事，我们明知道是错的，也要去坚持，因为不甘心；有些人，我们明知道是爱的，也要去放弃，因为没结局；有时候，我们明知道没路了，却还在前行，因为习惯了。

老鼠对猫说：我爱你！猫说：你走开！老鼠流泪走开。谁也没有看见老鼠走后，猫也流了一滴泪，其实有一种爱叫做放弃！

分手后不可以做朋友,因为彼此伤害过,不可以做敌人,因为彼此深爱过,所以我们变成了最熟悉的陌生人...

eGO and lOVE

2008-02-26T17:44:00.000-08:00

Once upon a time there was an island, where all the feelings lived together .

One day there was a storm in the sea and the island was about to get drowned.
Every feeling was scared but Love made a boat to escape.
Every feeling boarded the boat. Only 1 feeling was left.
Love got down to see who it was..
It was EGO..
Love tried and tried but ego wasn't moving also the water was rising.
Every one asked love to leave him and come in the boat, but love was made to love.

At last all the feelings escape and Love dies with ego on the island..

Love Dies because of EGO.

So, Kill ego and Save Love

Source: Forward email

Upgrading Errors (joke)

2008-02-26T01:50:00.001-08:00

Dear Tech Support Team:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0.

I soon noticed that the new program, Wife 1.0 installed itself into
all other programs and now monitors all other system activities.

Applications such as BachelorNights 10.3, Cricket 5.0, BeerWithBuddies
7.5 , and Outings 3.6 no longer runs, crashing the system whenever
selected. I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while
attempting to run my favorite applications.

I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 5.0 , but the 'uninstall'
doesn't work on Wife 1.0.

Please help!

Thanks,
"A Troubled User"

REPLY:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that people complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0 , thinking that it
is just a Utilities and Entertainment program.

Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run
EVERYTHING!! !

It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 5.0.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 5.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed not
to allow this.

I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to
alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because
ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the
system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean 2.5, Sweep
3.0, Cook 1.5 and DoLaundry 4.2. However, be very careful how you use
these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the
program NagNag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the
performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I
recommend Sarees 2.1 and Jewellery 5.0

STATUTORY WARNING : DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary
With ShortSkirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and
will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,
Tech Support ...

Just for Laugh (I hope you like it.)

2008-02-24T17:27:00.000-08:00

Teacher: History is a very interesting subject. It tells you about what
had happened in the past.
Student: Please teacher, I don't think I want to study history.
Teacher: Why?
Student: There is no future in it.
..................

Teacher: Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much
would your father still have?
Ted: $10.
Teacher: You don't know maths.
Ted: You don't know my father!
.................

Mother: David, come here.
David: Yes, mum?
Mother: You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse.
David: But I will only get my report book tomorrow.
Mother: I know that. But I am going to Hong Kong tomorrow, so I am
scolding you now.
..................

Father: Why did you fail your mathematics test?
Son: On Monday, teacher said 3+5=8
Father : So?
Son: On Tuesday, she said 4+4=8 And on Wednesday, she said 6+2=8. If
she can't make up her mind, how do I know the right answer?
....................

A mother and son were doing dishes while the father and daughter were
watching TV in the living room. Suddenly, there was loud crash of
breaking plates, then complete silence. The daughter turned to look at her father.
Daughter: It's mummy!
Father: How do you know?
Daughter: She didn't say anything.
.........

Girl: Do you love me?
Boy: Yes Dear
Girl: Would you die for me?
Boy: No, mine is undying love
.........

Man: How old is your father?
Boy: As old as me
Man: How can that be?
Boy: He became a father only when I was born
.........

Waiter: I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg.
Customer: Don't tell me your problems. Give me the menu
card.
........

Teacher: Simon, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as
your brother's. Did u copy his?
Simon: No, teacher, it's the same dog!
.........

Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!
Son: That's why I say she's no good!
.........

Teacher: 'Where were u born?'
Student: 'Singapore , Sir.'
Teacher: 'Which part?'
Student: 'All of me, Sir.'
.........

Teacher: 'How come you do not comb your hair?'
Ah Kow: 'No comb, Sir.'
Teacher: 'Use your dad's then.'
Ah Kow: 'No hair, Sir.'
.........

A boy came home from school with his exam results.
'What did u get?' asked his father.
'My marks are under water,' said the boy.
'What do u mean 'under water'?'
'They are all below 'C' level'

(source: forward email)

男人眼中完老婆必具备10点

2008-02-20T05:02:00.000-08:00

女人都希望自己是男人眼中最迷人的，但是男人们到底欣赏什么样的女人呢？你一定不知道……

1、最好永远优雅动人

不管是朋友聚会还是你公司的新年晚会，她的衣饰可以不惹眼，但底线是不要让你在众人面前丢面子。本着内外兼修的原则，她最好应对得体，有修养，有见识，有品位。除此之外，有了白头发要及时去染。不要让自己胖到不可收拾再去减肥。不要用洗旧的廉价内衣去配衬上千元的开司米外套。跟你亲热的时候不求妖艳，但求齐整——求你了，不要让我看见你的内衣绽线或者内裤破了一个洞。

2、重视性爱

她不是性爱无度的女人，但也别冷静到不把夫妻性爱当回事。她有健康的性观念，懂得主动，能跟你坦诚交流对性爱的感受。

3、重视家庭气氛

不要天天叫外卖。会几道从妈妈那里学来的拿手菜，工作不忙的时候为你做餐饭，有没有烛光不重要。略懂女红，你的扣子掉了，她很快就能缝上。有爱心。孩子出生后坚持母乳喂养，不怕身材走样。

4、养成读书的习惯

婚后的女人大多只读通俗或时尚杂志，这很正常。偏偏有些男人会有些浪漫情结，喜欢诗书文章，并希望自己的伴侣也有此雅好。读书是好事，当然读书不是为了装门面。读书让她免于无知的罪过，让她跟你有更多的共同话题，还能让她的气质得到提升。总的来说，还是一种有乐趣、有回报的付出。

5、偶尔跟你一起做梦

油盐柴米的生活里，男人心中偶尔会溢出一些不切实际的梦想。就算太过虚无缥缈，也不要不留情面地嘲笑你。有心情的时候，她跟你一起做做梦。别太担心，有哪个正常男人会那么死蠢，以为一场梦会永远不醒呢？

6、带点幽默气质

女人的温柔和善良是糖，但一味的甜总有一天会把男人给腻死。幽默气质是盐，它在女人的身体中分布稀少，可一旦存在，就能调出与众不同的味道——跟那些一听成人笑话就捂耳朵的女人相比，能讲得出一两个成人笑话的女人当然更有情趣。

7、爱屋及乌

爱你，就主动关心你的家人。你父母的生日，她早早地汇钱或者买礼物；你的兄弟姐妹有事，她比你还着急；你老家来的穷亲戚，她不会露出鄙夷之色，因为鄙夷你的亲戚就是鄙夷你的过去，就是鄙夷你这个人。

8、充满自信

对你跟女性朋友的交往，不要神经过敏，有点风吹草动就认为你有了外遇，要抛弃她。自信的女人永远不做跟在丈夫屁股后面嗅来嗅去的警犬，也不懂什么叫被抛弃。就算你真有了外遇，她也有信心能把你拖回她的身边——如果她还愿意要你的话。

9、宽容他的平凡

不对你期望过高，对你的平凡和平淡予以最大限度的宽容。你不是有钱佬，不是叱咤风云的成功人士，但她就是乐意跟着你过普通人的日子。她宽容，也识趣，不会动辄唠叨、抱怨你笨，赚不了大钱——要知道，男人最怕也最烦的就是这个。

10、她坚强独立

有些男人喜欢女人做依人小鸟，好让他们去保护。更多的男人则喜欢女人具有独立精神，不要动辄一把鼻涕一把泪，也不要整天黏着他，弄得她的世界里除了你之外连个聊天的朋友都没有。男人喜欢有自己的空间，其实你也希望你有你自己的空间。她坚强独立，在你心中才是最美。

List of youngest birth mothers

2008-02-13T07:41:00.000-08:00

Age 5

* 1939: Lina Medina of Paurange, Peru gave birth to a 2.7 kg son (5.9 lb), Gerardo, by caesarean section on May 14, 1939 in Lima at the age of 5 years, 7 months and 21 days. Her parents, who assumed their daughter had a tumor, took her to a hospital, where she was determined to be seven months pregnant. Although Medina's father was arrested on suspicion of rape, he was later released due to lack of evidence, and the identity of who impregnated Medina was never uncovered. The reason for her precocious fertility was cited to not lie in the ovaries themselves, but to must have stemmed from an extraordinary hormonal disorder of pituitary origin, causing her to have regular periods since the age of 3.See more

Age 8

* 2006: A girl from Huánuco, Peru, gave birth to a baby weighing 2 kg (4.4 lb) by caesarean section at a hospital in Lima in December 2006. Her ninth birthday occurred a couple of days later. She became pregnant after being raped by two of her cousins.See more[1][2][3]

Age 9

* 1957: Hilda Trujillo gave birth to a girl weighing over 6 lb (2.7 kg) at a hospital in Lima, Peru in December 1957. Her 22-year-old cousin, who was staying in her family's one-room house at the time, was arrested for rape.See more
* 2004: A Singaporean girl gave birth to a boy in 2004 after being impregnated by a fellow student at her school. Her mother initially thought she had a urinary tract infection, but, upon taking her to the doctor, learned she was already six months pregnant. The baby was given up for adoption.See more
* 2005: A girl gave birth to a baby boy by caesarean section at a hospital in Butare, Rwanda in December 2005. The child, who underwent breast development at age six and menarche at age eight, became pregnant after being raped by her family's domestic servant. See more
* 2006: A girl of the Apurinã, an indigenous people from the Amazon Rainforest in Brazil, gave birth to a baby girl weighing 2.2 kg (4.8 lb) by caesarean section at a hospital in Manaus in July 2006. Police are investigating the case. See more [1] [2]
* 2007: A girl from La Esperanza, Intibucá, Honduras gave birth to a baby girl by caesarean section in May 2007 after being raped by her father.

Age 10

* 1834: Sally Deweese of Butler County, Kentucky was reported by Dr. D. Rowlett to have delivered a baby girl weighing 7.75 lb (3.5 kg) on April 20, 1834. Deweese allegedly developed breasts within weeks of birth and began menstruating at 12 months.
* 2000: A girl from Bolivia gave birth to a baby girl weighing 2.5 kg (5.5 lb) by caesarean section at a hospital in Parque Patricios, Buenos Aires, Argentina on September 25, 2007. A 28-year-old was arrested on a charge of rape.[12][13]
* 2005: A girl from Calama, Chile gave birth to a baby boy by caesarean section at a hospital in Antofagasta on April 13, 2005. The child became pregnant after having been raped by her father at age nine. Her parents, who both came from Bolivia, were jailed.
* 2005: A girl gave birth to a baby girl at a hospital in Sion, Switzerland in August 2005. She had immigrated to Switzerland from Cameroon with her siblings when her mother married a Swiss citizen. A 68-year-old man who was in a relationship with the mother admitted to having molested the girl but a DNA test found that he was not the father of the girl's child.
* 2006: A girl in Abbeville, South Carolina gave birth by caesarean section in 2006 after having been raped by then-26-year-old William Edward Ronca. Ronca admitted to having molested the girl over a two year period and was sentenced to 25 years in prison as a result. The baby was given for adoption.
* 2006: A girl from Charleroi, Belgium gave birth in 2006. After the child began gaining weight, her mother put her on a diet, but when the girl visited a doctor, it was discovered that she was nine months pregnant. The father was a then-13-year-old boy who attended the same school as the girl. News of the birth did not become publicly known until 2007.
* 2006: A girl from Jaral del Progreso, Guanajuato, Mexico gave birth naturally to a baby girl weighing 2.3 kg (5 lb) on April 3, 2006. She became pregnant after being raped by a 47-year-old neighbour, who was sentenced to 11 years, 6 months in prison for the crime.
* 2007: A girl from San Lorenzo Cacaotepec, Oaxaca, Mexico gave birth to a baby boy on July 2, 2007. Her pregnancy was the result of a rape committed by the 65-year-old landlord of the house which her parents rented. The man was jailed.

Age 11

* 1972: A girl gave birth at the age of 11 years, 10 months at Royal Buckinghamshire Hospital in Aylesbury, England. The father was the young girl's stepbrother.
* 2002: A girl from Bridgeport, Connecticut gave birth after being raped by a 75-year-old man, who was arrested on April 17, 2002.
* 2004: A girl gave birth to a baby boy weighing 8.4 lb (3.8 kg) at a hospital in Kharkiv, Ukraine in January 2004. The girl, who is currently the youngest mother in Ukraine, is suspected to have been impregnated by a 26-year-old neighbor, who fled in the fear of facing prosecution.
* 2005: A girl gave birth to a boy in Moscow, Russia, after she was impregnated by her 14-year-old boyfriend.
* 2006: A girl of African origin gave birth to a baby boy at a hospital in West London, United Kingdom on May 5, 2006. A 37-year-old man was arrested.
* 2007: A girl from Valhalla Park, Cape Town, South Africa gave birth to a baby boy on July 12, 2007. An elderly security guard was arrested in connection with rape. The mother will be allowed to visit her child once a month at the hospital.

Sexy Furniture by Mario Philippona - Erotic, Inviting, and Expensive!

2008-02-13T01:28:00.000-08:00

Everyone agrees that a woman’s body in perfect shape is admirable. So what if it is in the shape of furniture? Beauty is something that gives pleasure each time you look at it. So if the furniture of your home is beautifully designed and resembles a perfectly shaped woman’s body, you will feel good all the time you use it. Just imagine how you will feel when you open the cupboard of wine or put it on the table on the heeled toes of a woman. Sculptor Mario Philippona has developed a series of Sexy Furniture, which is unique, inviting, and expensive. He designs his works on life size working drawings and assembles his sculptures from pre-cut layers of wood. This way he can reproduce the most perfect female forms. The works are handcrafted from regional timber and finished with natural oil and wax. He is offering a range of sexy furniture, including wine cabinets, tables, chairs, everything resembling female body parts. His Trio, a table with unique design costs €19,995 while the Boobycase sets you back a cool €9,995. A woman’s breasts cupboard demands 6,000 Euros. Check out the picture gallery after the jump to see the spectacular erotic furniture by Mario Philippona.

Check out the sexy furniture from here

Multi Monitor Desk System with the flipIT advantage

2008-02-13T01:27:00.001-08:00

Now, this is probably the best computer-related innovation since the laptop. The flipIT DUO Mounting System from SmartDesks lets you view multiple programs and tool palette running on your PC. It’s like having two separate windows opens all the time. By expanding the area of vision, power users get to literally double their workspace on the desktop. You can choose between having two 19-inch monitors or one single 36″ case width cinema widescreen display plugged into your flipIT DUO Mounting System to max out your station. The screens are adjustable so you can tilt the display at an angle you are best comfortable with while the extra-wide keyboard and mouse tray lends you all the flexibility your heart desires. Internal wire management, cable ports on both sides, and open access to the CPU make the DUO Desk an IT installer’s dream. No words on pricing.

Enjoy your vacation 24/7 with Patio Scenes

2008-02-13T01:25:00.000-08:00

Breath taking scenarios from vacations remain etched in your memories once you are back home. But, didn’t you wish the vacation lasted for ever? Here’s a brilliant idea that’ll let you have a holiday 24/7. Patio Scenes are captivating sceneries that are designed to enhance the view of your interiors. Whether you want to have a holiday in your living, patio, or your pool, Patio Scenes from CreateMyScene lets you create your own holiday. You don’t have to worry about your nosy neighbors either, as these scenes are visible only from the inside with an option of choosing similar scenery for the outside. These Scenes are printed with the high quality UV inks which protect the surface from fading, are fade resistant and durable enough to let you have a holiday for ten long years. No word on the pricing.

Wise old man

2008-02-12T20:12:00.001-08:00

A wise old gentleman retired and purchased a modest home near a junior high school. He spent the first few weeks of his retirement in peace and contentment. Then a new school year began. The very next afternoon three young boys, full of youthful, after-school enthusiasm, came down his street, beating merrily on every trash can they encountered. The crashing percussion continued day after day, until finally the wise old man decided it was time to take some action.

The next afternoon, he walked out to meet the young percussionists as they banged their way down the street. Stopping them, he said, "You kids are a lot of fun. I like to see you express your exuberance like that. In fact, I used to do the same thing when I was your age. Will you do me a favor? I'll give you each a dollar if you'll promise to come around every day and do your thing."

The kids were elated and continued to do a bang-up job on the trashcans.

After a few days, the old-timer greeted the kids again, but this time he had a sad smile on his face. "This recession's really putting a big dent in my income," he told them. "From now on, I'll only be able to pay you 50 cents to beat on the cans."

The noisemakers were obviously displeased, but they accepted his offer and continued their afternoon ruckus. A few days later, the wily retiree approached them again as they drummed their way down the street.

"Look," he said, "I haven't received my Social Security check yet, so I'm not going to be able to give you more than 25 cents. Will that be okay?"

"A freakin' quarter?" the drum leader exclaimed. "If you think we're going to waste our time, beating these cans around for a quarter, you're nuts! No way, dude. We quit!" And the old man enjoyed peace and serenity for the rest of his days.

Poor old man

2008-02-12T20:08:00.001-08:00

An old man is sitting on a park bench crying. A young man is walking by and asks him why he's crying. The old man says, "I'm retired and I have lots of money, a huge luxury apartment, a beautiful 25 year old wife who loves me and has sex with me twice a day"

The young man says, "Well then why the hell are you crying!?"

The old man replies, "I can't remember where I live!"

谁是成功男人背后的星女孩 (6)

2008-02-12T08:01:00.000-08:00

人们都说任何成功男人的背后都必然有个伟大的女人。这些星座女为了老公的前途往往在家庭中独当一面，或者成为老公事业上的好帮手，他们就是你最值得娶回家的女人。

天秤座可以为爱情付出一切无怨无悔，她会去经营婚姻，而且也会制造浪漫，所以她不会让老公觉得讨了个黄脸婆回来，但是老公如果需要她出头的话，她也会替老公打点好公关，她一定会让所有的人只感受到老公好的一面，会把自己的委屈隐藏起来

天蝎座老婆在外面可以把自己处理的很好，光这一点就让老公面子十足，但是她也会很懂得谦虚，而且会在外人面前称赞自己的老公，但是回到家之后会把老公的缺点讲出来，她认为这是为对方好，一定要帮助对方。

魔羯座老婆为了老公宁愿当隐形人，只要老公交代的事情她都能够做的很好，而且她会很认真很努力很得体的应付一切，绝对不会老公为了家里的事情有一丝一毫的烦心。

巨蟹座希望自己的下一代很优秀，有优秀的老爸可以崇拜，所以她会一心一意的营造一个非常好的环境，老公在外面打拼，老婆就应该给老公一个安定的家，甚至宁愿放弃自己的事业来做一个贤妻良母。

金牛座的女生不管自己的老公在外面受到多少的风雨，只要回到家里就是最安全的港湾，她会清楚的让老公知道，自己永远是站在他那边，老公在自己心目中是永远最好的，在老公受难没有自信的时候，Taurus金牛老婆的功能就显现出来了，她会帮助老公保持镇定，然后打点好一切。

男人对女人de期盼

2008-02-12T06:26:00.000-08:00

1、你最好永远优雅动人

不管是朋友聚会还是他公司的新年晚会，你的衣饰可以不惹眼，但底线是不要让他在众人面前丢面子。本着内外兼修的原则，你最好应对得体，有修养，有见识，有品位。除此之外，有了白头发要及时去染。不要让自己胖到不可收拾再去减肥。不要用洗旧的廉价内衣去配衬上千元的开司米外套。跟他亲热的时候不求妖艳，但求齐整——求你了，不要让他看见你的内衣绽线或者内裤破了一个洞。

2、重视性爱

你不是性爱无度的女人，但也别冷静到不把夫妻性爱当回事。你有健康的性观念，懂得主动，能跟他坦诚交流对性爱的感受。

3、重视家庭气氛

不要天天叫外卖。会几道从妈妈那里学来的拿手菜，工作不忙的时候为他做餐饭，有没有烛光不重要。略懂女红，他的扣子掉了，你很快就能缝上。有爱心。孩子出生后坚持母乳喂养，不怕身材走样。

4、养成读书的习惯

婚后的女人大多只读通俗或时尚杂志，这很正常。偏偏有些男人会有些浪漫情结，喜欢诗书文章，并希望自己的伴侣也有此雅好。读书是好事，当然读书不是为了装门面。读书让你免于无知的罪过，让你跟他有更多的共同话题，还能让你的气质得到提升。总的来说，还是一种有乐趣、有回报的付出。

5、偶尔跟他一起做梦

油盐柴米的生活里，男人心中偶尔会溢出一些不切实际的梦想。就算你认为它太过虚无缥缈，也不要不留情面地嘲笑他。有心情的时候，跟他一起做做梦。别太担心，有哪个正常男人会那么死蠢，以为一场梦会永远不醒呢？

6、带点幽默气质

女人的温柔和善良是糖，但一味的甜总有一天会把男人给腻死。幽默气质是盐，它在女人的身体中分布稀少，可一旦存在，就能调出与众不同的味道——跟那些一听成人笑话就捂耳朵的女人相比，能讲得出一两个成人笑话的女人当然更有情趣。

7、爱屋及乌

爱他，就主动关心他的家人。他父母的生日，你早早地汇钱或者买礼物；他的兄弟姐妹有事，你比他还着急；他老家来的穷亲戚，你不要露出鄙夷之色，因为鄙夷他的亲戚就是鄙夷他的过去，就是鄙夷他这个人。

8、充满自信

对他跟女性朋友的交往，不要神经过敏，有点风吹草动就认为他有了外遇，要抛弃你。自信的女人永远不做跟在丈夫屁股后面嗅来嗅去的警犬，也不懂什么叫被抛弃。就算他真有了外遇，你也有信心能把他拖回你的身边——如果你还愿意要他的话。

9、宽容他的平凡

不对他期望过高，对他的平凡和平淡予以最大限度的宽容。他不是有钱佬，不是叱咤风云的成功人士，但你就是乐意跟着他过普通人的日子。你宽容，也识趣，不会动辄唠叨、抱怨他笨，赚不了大钱——要知道，男人最怕也最烦的就是这个。

10、你坚强独立

有些男人喜欢女人做依人小鸟，好让他们去保护。更多的男人则喜欢女人具有独立精神，不要动辄一把鼻涕一把泪，也不要整天黏着他，弄得你的世界里除了他之外连个聊天的朋友都没有。男人喜欢有自己的空间，其实他也希望你有你自己的空间。你坚强独立，在他心中才是最美。

Source:www.ccvv120.com

46个不可不知的生活小常识 (part II)

2008-02-11T21:21:00.002-08:00

21、最佳睡眠时间是在晚上10点~清晨6点
22、每天喝酒不要超过一杯, 因为酒精会抑制制造抗体的B细胞,增加细菌感染的机会
23、服用胶囊应以冷水吞服(可以第一个吃), 睡前30分先服药.忌立即躺下
24、酸梅具防止老化作用, 青春永驻;肝火有毛病者宜多食用
25、掉发因素: 熬夜,压力,烟酒,香鸡排.麻辣锅.油腻食物.调味过重的料理
26、帮助头发生长:多食用包心菜,蛋.豆类;少吃甜食(尤其是果糖)
27、每天一杯柠檬汁,柳橙汁. 不但可以美白还可以淡化黑斑
28、苹果是机车族、瘾君子、家庭主妇的常备良药，一天一颗，才能让自己有个
干干净净的肺
29、抽烟又吃维他命(B胡萝卜素-A维他命的一种), 会致癌,尽早戒烟.才是最健康
的做法
30、女性不宜喝茶的五个时期: 月经来时,孕妇,临产前.生产完后,更年期
31、抽烟,关系最大的是肺癌,唇癌,舌癌,喉癌,食道癌,也与膀胱癌有关
32、饮酒导致肝硬化 .引发肝癌
33、吃槟榔会导致口腔纤维化, 口腔癌
34、食物过于精细,缺乏纤维; 含大量脂肪,尤其是胆固醇会引发胃癌
35、食物过于粗糙, 营养不足时导致食道癌,胃癌
36、食品中的黄曲毒素. 亚硝酸类物皆具有致癌性
37、不抽烟. 拒吸二手烟
38、适量饮酒, 不拚久.不醉酒
39、减少食用盐腌.烟熏,烧烤的食物
40、每天摄取新鲜的蔬菜与水果
41、每天摄取富含高纤维的五谷类及豆类
42、每天摄取均衡的饮食, 不过量
43、维持理想体重. 不过胖
44、保持规律的生活与运动
45、保持轻松愉快的心情
46、正确饮食习惯: 早上吃的像皇帝,中午吃的像平民,晚上吃的像乞丐

46个不可不知的生活小常识 (part I)

2008-02-11T21:21:00.001-08:00

1、常吃宵夜.会得胃癌. 因为胃得不到休息
2、一个星期只能吃四颗蛋.吃太多.对身体不好
3、鸡屁股含有致癌物, 不要吃较好
4、饭后吃水果是错误的观念. 应是饭前吃水果
5、女生月经来时.不要喝绿茶. 反正茶类不要喝就对了.多吃可以补血的东西
6、喝豆浆时不要加鸡蛋及糖. 也不要喝太多
7、空腹时不要吃蕃茄, 最好饭后吃
8、早上醒来.先喝一杯水. 预防结石
9、睡前三小时不要吃东西. 会胖
10、少喝奶茶. 因为高热量.高油.没有营养价值可言.长期饮用.易罹患高血压.糖尿病.等疾病
11、刚出炉的面包不宜马上食用
12、远离充电座. 人体应远离30公分以上.切忌放在床边
13、天天喝水八大杯
14、每天十杯水. 膀胱癌不会来
15、白天多喝水. 晚上少喝水
16、一天不要喝两杯以上的咖啡. 喝太多易导致失眠,胃痛
17、多油脂的食物少吃.因为得花5~7小时去消化,并使脑中血液集中到肠胃.易昏
昏欲睡
18、下午五点后.大餐少少吃, 因为五点后身体不需那么多能量
19、10种吃了会快乐的食物: 深海鱼,香蕉,葡萄柚,全麦面包,菠菜,大蒜,南瓜,低
脂牛奶,鸡肉,樱桃
20、睡眠不足会变笨, 一天须八小时睡眠,有午睡习惯较不会老

Find yourself ... :P

2008-02-11T21:01:00.000-08:00

一句话笑话(成人版)

2008-02-09T06:05:00.000-08:00

1、生物课上，老师说：“其实黄鼠狼是不吃鸡的，科学家做过一个实验，曾经把一只鸡和一只黄鼠狼关在一起，第二天你们猜怎么了？”同学插嘴道：“鸡怀孕了？”

2、最真实的事：老师要求我们用“果然”这词来造句，我那同桌就写：我三个月没洗澡，身上果然臭了。

3、有一对夫妻,丈夫怀疑妻子偷汉子,所以有一天上班时偷偷跑回来,听见屋里传来那种不堪入耳的声音,寻思这回歹个正着,刚要翻身入墙的时候突然从后面被人拉住,那个人说:"不要插队,排队去."

4、一新兵起床总落后挨骂,便买染料涂于身上,酷似迷彩装。半夜军号响,他首先冲出营房长官表扬:很好!穿着很整齐,但下次注意,手榴弹应该挂在后面。

5、男女ML,女总疯狂地叫,邻居敲门抗议!男说快别出声,女答可以.随后女便双目紧闭,牙关紧咬,浑身发抖. 男的慌问咋啦?女答:没事接着干,我改震动了!

6、在一个偏远的山区.有一水性扬花的女人,结婚以后,见丈夫外出做生意,便与情人在家中偷情.事到一半时,听到屋外传来脚步声,女人慌忙取来羊皮大衣让情妇披上.到后院羊圈里面躲躲,丈夫回家便拉过女人欲行房事.女人不答应.丈夫忍耐不住.便到后院羊圈拉过一只羊,一番云雨过后.男人满意的回房睡觉.到半夜,男人又去和那羊云雨了一番,早晨起来,男人想起昨晚那只羊,觉得羊别有一番情趣,便又到羊圈抓过那只羊,准备行房事.突然那羊站起身来,大声说,你他妈的是不是有病啊.羊圈里就我这一只羊吗?

7、有一个女人碰到一个食人族,吓的她亡命飞奔,跑了一个多小时想食人族应该被甩掉了,没想到食人族突然出现在前面,吓的魂飞魄散,小便失禁,食人族看到那个女人吓的撒了尿,叹息一声说:"唉,好可惜的汤啊."

8、有一对新婚夫妇，新婚之夜夫妻俩洞房花烛做爱做的很舒服，可是那之后过了一个月丈夫都不再做爱，有一天妻子实在受不了，就要求丈夫做爱，丈夫说：“这么好的事怎么能天天做，逢年过节再做啊。”

9、有对夫妻，妻子病了，去看医生，医生说这得了这病后行房事可能会有生命危险，那天回去后就和丈夫分屋睡，可是没过两天，晚上妻子去敲丈夫屋的门，丈夫问谁啊，妻子回答：“不怕死的。”

10、有一次举办奶子比赛，就是看谁的奶子大，主持人宣布一号上场，裁判看到一号的奶子像香瓜那么大，就叫一号香瓜小姐。主持人又宣布二号上场，裁判们看二号的像西瓜那么大，所以叫她西瓜小姐。轮到三号上场了，裁判们看到三号小姐的胸就叫她苹果小姐，并且给了她一等奖，原因是。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。三号的奶头像苹果那么大。

11、有个出租车司机开车时看见前面有个疯狂的开摩托车的人后坐上的小孩子快要被甩出去了，好心的出租车司机于是追上那个开摩托车的人说到：“伙计，你的孩子快要从后坐上掉来了。”开摩托车的人听到后向后坐看去，看到自己的孩子后惊奇的问：“咦，儿子，你妈妈呢?"

12、还是女医生好。

西部大开发，一帮乡下小伙进城打工。看到街上穿着大胆年轻漂亮的女孩，不禁想入非非。

其中年纪最小的忽然感觉跨下无比难受，于是找了一家私人诊所。大夫看他傻逼呼呼的，说：“肿了，打针吃药！”，于是他交了钱，黑心的大夫给他打了镇静剂，好了！

次日，旧疾复发，他又来到那家诊所，恰巧大夫不在，他老婆帮看。

一小时后，大夫回来了，小伙高兴的迎上去说：“谢谢你们不收钱！”

“怎么回事？”

“那个女医生医术真高，不打针不吃药，不但消了肿，连脓都弄出来了！”

大夫：#￥%……

成功的婚姻只有爱不够

2008-02-09T05:53:00.001-08:00

所谓“爱情能成就幸福的婚姻”，只是一个假象。婚姻之爱是有条件的，而成功的婚姻只有爱是不够的。
　　因为爱情和婚姻不同。爱情是心灵的愉悦，而婚姻是一种社会契约。那些有关婚姻幸福的神话，似乎想向人们表明，浪漫的爱情足以营造婚姻的幸福。事实上，爱情虽奇妙，但不能解决一切婚后的实际问题和困难。
　　其次，恋爱时，很多人喜欢“跟着感觉走”。这种感觉始于欣赏，是比较利己的；而爱应是利人的，是一种主观的心理状态，是一种亲近又温暖、不计回报愿意为对方全身心付出的态度。真爱绝不仅仅停留在自己的感觉上，而是一份亲密、一份激情，再加上一份承诺。爱——LOVE——的真正含义，远比喜欢复杂得多：
　　L——聆听（listen）。既然真爱需要我们尊重，那必须知道他/她到底想要什么，每个人都要积极主动地聆听，用眼神和肢体语言表达你的理解。
　　O——奉献自己（offer yourself）。奉献源于真爱，应该把爱人的需求看得比自己的重要，而不是只考虑自己受了什么委屈。要知道，过分关注自己的“伤口”，就会失去爱别人的能力。
　　V——尊重（value）。每天花10分钟，设法让对方感到被尊重和重视。你越尊重你的爱人，他（她）的感情砝码就越偏向你。
　　E——拥抱（embrace）。只有在聆听、奉献和尊重之后，才能达到幸福的拥抱之路。而每一次深情拥抱都会使双方永葆激情，并经常能发生共鸣。
　　遵循这样的“爱”之路，相爱的双方就会在生活的冲突中成熟，在情感的波浪中成长，在自己的生命历程中营造出一份真实的幸福。

Home entertainment gets HOT with the Vok Multimedia Fireplace

2008-02-08T20:12:00.000-08:00

Are you looking for the ultimate home entertainment unit jazz up your living? Take a look at the Multimedia fireplace from Vok, a unit that integrates a fireplace, a BOSE sound system, LCD TV, DVD player and the internet via a PC. So, you can have a ball dancing to the romantic tunes with your date, cozy up with your loved ones while you watch your favorite soaps, catch up on the latest movies or enjoy social networking with your online buddies. The design is modular and contemporary and fits well with any décor style. Available in 4 sizes with oak, birch, and rosewood finishes, the pricing ranges from $23,800 for smaller unit to $31,500 for the extra large one.

最实用的爱情原则

2008-02-08T08:25:00.000-08:00

1.不要为了寂寞去恋爱，时间是个魔鬼，天长日久，如果你是个多情的人，即使不爱对方，到时候也会产生感情，最后你怎么办？

2.不要为了负责而去结婚。要知道，不爱对方却和对方结婚是最不负责的。即使当时让对方很伤心，但是总比让他几年甚至一辈子伤心强。

3.不管多大多老，不管家人朋友怎么催，都不要随便对待婚姻，婚姻不是打牌，重新洗牌要付出巨大代价。

4.感情的事基本上没有谁对谁错，他（她）要离开你，总是你有什么地方不能令他满足，回头想想过去在一起的日子，总是美好的。当然，卑劣的感情骗子也有，他们的花言巧语完全是为了骗取对方和自己上床，这样的人还是极少数。

5.和一个生活习惯有很多差异的人恋爱不要紧，结婚要慎重，想想你是否可以长久忍受彼此的不同。

6.有人说恋爱要找自己喜欢的人，结婚要找喜欢自己的人，都是片面的。恋人不喜欢自己有什么可恋的？老婆自己不喜欢怎么过一辈子？ 7.真爱一个人，就要尽量让他开心，他开心了你就会开心，那么双方就有**了。

8.不要因为自己长相不如对方而放弃追求的打算，长相只是一时的印象，真正决定能否结合主要取决于双方的性格。我见过的帅哥配丑女，丑女配帅哥的太多了。

9.女人要学会扮靓自己，不要拿朴素来做挡箭牌，不要拿家务做借口，不懂时尚，你就不是一个完整的女人。

10.恋爱的时间能长尽量长。这最少有两点好处：一，充分，尽可能长的享受恋爱的愉悦，婚姻和恋爱的感觉是很不同的。二，两人相处时间越长，越能检验彼此是否真心，越能看出两人性格是否合得来。这样婚后的感情就会牢固得多。

11.男人不坏，女人不爱，这坏不是指心肠狠毒，自私无情什么的。而是指油嘴滑舌，花言巧语。一般的好男人以为说情话是油嘴滑舌，轻浮肉麻的表现，所以不愿去做。对别人这样说是不对，可是对自己老婆，就要油嘴滑舌一点。为什么不能做个心好嘴滑的男人呢？

12.都说婚姻是爱情的坟墓，那是因为婚前已经往去坟墓的路上走着。就算不结婚也会在坟墓前分手。为什么不先分手就一头钻进坟墓呢？

13.只会读书的女人是一本字典，再好人们也只会在需要的时候去翻看一下，只会扮靓的女人只是一具花瓶，看久了也就那样。服饰美容是做好一个女人的必要条件，不是充要条件。你还需要多看书。这样你会发现生活更加美好。

14.平平淡淡才是真，没错，可那应该是**过后的平淡，然后再起**，再有平淡。**平淡应呈波浪形交替出现。光有平淡无**的生活有什么意思？只要你真心爱他，到死你也会有**的。

15.你爱他吗？爱就告诉他，何必把思念之苦藏在心底深处。怕样子，地位，身份不相配？别怕，爱一个人是美好的。

16.老婆和老妈掉进了河里，我先救老妈，因为是老妈给了我生命，我找不到任何理由丢下她不管。老婆如果没救上来，我可以再给她陪葬，在墓里继续我们的爱情。

17.草率地结了婚已经是错了，再也不要草率地去离婚。先试试看，真的不行再离也不迟。

18.经常听说男人味女人味，你知道男人味是一种什么味道，女人味又是一种什么味道吗？男人味就是豁达勇敢，女人味就是温柔体贴。

19.魅力是什么？魅力不是漂亮，漂亮的女人不一定能吸引我，端庄幽雅的女人我才喜欢。所以你不用担心自己不够漂亮。

20.初恋都让人难忘，觉得美好。为什么？不是因为他（她）很漂亮或很帅，也不是因为得不到的就是好的，而是因为人初涉爱河时心里异常纯真，绝无私心杂念，只知道倾己所有去爱对方。而以后的爱情都没有这么纯洁无瑕了。纯真是人世间最为可贵的东西。我们渴求的就是她。

21.初恋的人大多都不懂爱，所以初恋失败的多。成功的少。结婚应该找个未婚的，因为谁都喜欢原装。而恋爱，还是找个恋爱过的人才好。因为经历过恋爱的人才知道什么是爱，怎么去爱。

22.男人有钱就变坏，是的，很多男人这样，不过，一有钱就变坏的男人就算没钱，也好不到哪里去。

23.一个男人能不能给你安全感，完全不取决于他的身高，而取决于他的心高。高大而窝囊的男人我见过不少。矮小而昂扬的男人我也见过。一个男人要心高气傲，这样才像男人。当然，前提是要有才华。

24.天长地久有没有？当然有！为什么大多数人不相信有？因为他们没有找到人生旅途中最适合自己的那一个。也就是冥冥中注定的那一个。为什么找不到？茫茫人海，人生如露，要找到最合适自己的那一个谈何容易？你或许可以在40岁时找到上天注定的那一个，可是你能等到40岁吗？在20多岁时找不到，却不得不结婚，在三四十岁时找到却不得不放弃。这就是人生的悲哀。

25.为什么生活中很少见到传说中天长地久，可歌可泣的爱情故事？因为这样的感情非常可贵，可贵的东西是那么好见到的吗？金子钻石容易见到吗？

26.从前失恋之时，我都会恨她，恨她为什么这么薄情寡义，听到有关她的不好的消息，我都会偷着乐，现在不了，现在即使失去她，我也会祝福她，衷心希望她能过得很好。她过得不好我会很难过。这也是喜欢和爱的一个区别。

27.和聪明的人恋爱会很快乐，因为他们幽默，会说话，但也时时存在着危机，因为这样的人很容易变心。和老实的人恋爱会很放心，但生活却也非常得乏味。

28.女人不要太好强，有的女人自尊心过强。是别人的错她态度很强硬，是自己的错她同样态度很强硬。她总以为去求别人是下贱的表现，她是永远不会求男人的。这样的女人很令人头疼。聪明的女人会知道什么时候该坚强，什么时候该示弱。好强应该对外人，对爱的人这么好强你还要不要他呵护你啊？

29.要看一个人有没有内涵，内看谈吐，外看着装。还可以看写字。谈吐可以看出一个人的学识和修养。着装可以看出一个人的品位，写字可以看出一个人的性格。

30.想知道一个人爱不爱你，就看他和你在一起有没有活力，开不开心，有就是爱，没有就是不爱。

31.有的人老是抱怨找不好人，一两次不要紧，多了就有问题了，首先你要检讨自己本身有没有问题，如果没有，那你就要审视一下自己的眼光了，为什么每次坏人总被你碰到？

32.有人说男人一旦变心，九头牛也拉不回，难道女人变心，九头牛就拉得回来吗？男女之间只在生理上有差异，心理方面大同小异。

33.爱情与人品没多大关系，从前有个女同事跟我说她喜欢射雕里的杨康，不喜欢郭靖，我很惊奇，爱坏厌好？后来想想，也没什么，杨康认贼作父，**求荣是不对。可他对爱情却很执着，这样的人为什么不能享有爱？现实生活也有这样的例子，古惑仔也有古惑仔的爱情。

34.有人说没有面包的爱情终究会夭折。我说说这话的人不懂什么是爱情。从前恋爱我很反感别人说女方这条件好那条件好。我不管你什么出身，什么学历，什么地位，如果我爱你，你擦皮鞋甚至***猫扑.爱生活我也无所谓。大人说我幼稚，没有钱怎么过日子？我说有钱没爱过的是什么日子？和自己爱的人在一起，喝水吃腌菜我也是高兴的。

35.如果真爱一个人，就会心甘情愿为他而改变。如果一个人在你面前我行我素，置你不喜欢的行为而不顾，那么他就是不爱你。

姐弟恋的五大科学依据

2008-02-08T08:23:00.000-08:00

姐弟恋在如今的社会似乎有愈演愈烈的趋势，无论是影视作品还是日常生活都离不开这个主题，眼看着越来越多的小伙子被“阿姨”们带回家，小女孩儿的心理肯定是很不舒服的。不过事情还真由不得大家看不惯，最近的一些科学研究表明，姐弟恋这个件事背后是有科学依据的。...

1、小男配大女，性爱质量更有保证。　　男人的睾丸激素水平30岁是顶峰，40岁就开始走下坡了，然而女人对性的需求却会持续相对较长的时间，这时选择同龄人的弊端就体现出来了，于是大女人们当然愿意选择那些比自己小的男人多享性福了。...

2、跟小男人在一起，大女人也会变得年轻。　　年轻人对新鲜事物的接受度相对较高，这样大女人们的世界里自然少不了各种时髦的新鲜元素，有了这些元素的滋润，真是想不年轻都不行。...

3、傍上大女人，小男人不必辛苦奋斗。　　大女人们年龄大，物质上的各方面条件也相对优越，对于部分小男人而言，背靠大树好乘凉绝对是少奋斗的不二法门。...

4、丰满的女性在男性眼中更有利于养育后代。　　大女人通常不像小女生那般瘦弱，单从生物学的角度讲，男性更倾向于选择丰乳肥臀的伴侣，以利繁殖后代。...

5、大女人更有女人味。　　大女人经久历练，知道如何更好的满足男人的各项需求，包括心理上的和生理上的，这是小女生们望尘莫及的。...

女人千万不能在男友面前说的四句话

2008-02-08T07:47:00.000-08:00

第一句：我跟你以前的女友比怎么样？

很明显，这是在逼他拿着你跟以前的女友作比较。虽然女人这时候想得到的都是肯定答案，比如“宝贝儿，你当然比她强多了”，但事实上，这句话会勾起他以往的一些记忆，尤其是美好的记忆。两个人在一起时，总是会看到对方的缺点，但一旦分手，再想起对方却往往只会记住那些优点。作为女人，要懂得让一个男人避开曾经那段回忆，在感情上争强好胜到头来只会让他想起了她的好，得不偿失啊！

第二句：我跟你无话可说！

这是在提醒他：也许我们已经到了无法沟通的地步了！怎么办？是否该考虑分手了呢？但实际上这也许只是女人一时的感情气愤，过不了多久就会烟消云散，但对于男人而言，长时间多次重复这样的话会让他们感到失望，其实，男人也是注重沟通的动物！

第三句：我这么丑怎么办？

虽说女人都是虚荣的动物，但有些女人就是不自信，当然，有时候这也是女人的一种手段，故意表现出劣势而且不自信的一面好博得男人的怜惜。但事实情况往往相反，男人喜欢而且热爱自信满满的女人，这对于他们而言是一种诱惑，是一种理想。而一个经常说自己难看丑陋的女人，时间久了，真的会让男人相信：她真的就是如此！所以，在男人眼中，当一个女人说：“我这么美怎么办？”时一定会比她说“我这么丑怎么办？”时更可爱！

第四句：你看看人家的男朋友……

“人家的男朋友比你帅！”“人家的男朋友比你有钱！”“人家的男朋友比你温柔比你体贴！”但男人会说：“既然如此，你干嘛不去找他？”很明显，男人痛恨女友拿自己跟别的男人相比较，因为在他看来这是对他本人的一种否定：原来自己在她的眼里也是可以随随便便和其他男人相提并论的！作为女人，一定要尽量避免这样的比较，当然，男人也还是蛮喜欢女友拿自己的长处去跟其他男人的短处相比较的，这样会比较有成就感！

偷听夜晚同房事

2008-02-07T22:30:00.000-08:00

有一个新来的太监怕睡着了听不见皇上的吩咐又怕耽误皇上和娘娘的好事自作主张藏在了床底下。

第二天早上被发现。

皇上道:“好你个奴才在朕的床底下待了几个时辰？”

太监跪倒在地答道:回皇上的话奴才在床下过了五更天。

“你都听到了什么？”

一更天您和娘娘在赏画。

“此话怎讲？”

听您和娘娘说……“来让我看看双峰秀乳。”

“二更天呢？”

“二更天您好像掉地下了。”

“此话怎讲。”

“听娘娘说:你快上来呀！”

“三更天呢?"你们好像在吃螃蟹。”

“此话怎讲？”

“听您在说:把腿掰开!”

“四更天呢？”

“四更天好像您的岳母大人来了。？

“此话怎讲？”

“奴才听见娘娘高声喊道:"哎呀我的妈呀哎呀我的妈呀!!!!”

“五更天呢？”

“您跟娘娘在下象棋。”

“此话怎讲？”

奴才听娘娘说:“再来一炮再来一炮!!!!”

十二生肖08年运程最全解析

2008-02-07T22:08:00.000-08:00

在这一年里，那些生肖可以在工作学习中遇到新桃花？又有哪些生肖会把人际关系搞坏？

肖鼠

今年是犯太岁年，情绪起伏不定，感情易生事端，容易有迁移、外出、变化之象。而犯太岁年愈多外游，对情绪的影响就愈小，故今年最宜旅游、移居等活动，否则亦宜多作业余进修，以分散不安情绪。不过，犯太岁与运程好坏无关。

财运：本年为财运加权力地位提升年，不管上班或从商的你，收入都会比往年好，财来时宜买实物增运。朋友今年有助财运增益。

事业：虽然犯太岁，但事业不差，地位提升，但没有实质好处，可能是管的事多了。

感情：今年为犯太岁年，本来若有结婚生子等喜事，可化解犯太岁带来的情绪影响。已婚者注意情绪勿意气用事。未婚者意见不合。

健康：犯太岁年易见损伤，尤其要注意足、股、面、齿方面。驾驶者尤其要小心，最好减少驾驶，多用公共交通工具，亦可以捐血、洗牙、验血以应损伤。

人缘：犯太岁者，是非必多，不论公事私事都有或大或小的是非。今年易与别人发生诉讼和冲突。

肖牛　　

今年为合太岁年，交际应酬佳，人缘亦好，间接对事业有帮助。又今年乃辛苦得财年，整体运程不差。投资可作小尝试，但以短线为佳，如有任何机会皆可把握机会。惟今年工作特别忙，要注意健康。健康上仍需注意腹部、肠胃，又今年各方面比较平稳，没有事情要特别需小心注意，桃花方面亦一般，感情出现变化机会不大。

财运：今年为辛苦得财年，财运较平稳，对从商者较有利，上班一族则工作量大了，收入却不见明显增加，只得忙碌二字。

事业：今年为辛苦得财年，工作量大增，只以一九六一年秋冬出生的牛进步较不明显，其他各牛在事业上都有或多或少的进步。

感情：因今年与太岁合，感情较平淡，已有另一半的你看不见任何变化，单身的你有新桃花机会，但会有暗恋对象。

健康：下半年易受胃肠疾病困扰，宜多注意饮食习惯。皮肤易有敏感症状。

人缘：上半年是非仍多，尤其要留意农历六月及九月，其余时间不受是非影响，人缘不错。

肖虎　　

今年并非犯太岁生肖，亦无相冲、相合、桃花，较为平稳，本年会有远方来的好消息或贵人扶助。今年宜置物业，或家里装修，本年宜在家中多添置电器。父母身体健康差。做生意的朋友容易收到空头支票。

财运：本年整体为辛苦得财年，对收入不稳者有利，但对收入稳定的上班族则无好处。另今年虽然忙碌，但不会带来特殊收益。

事业：今年宜计划开创事业有贵人相助，宜改变工作环境有新发展。对流动性工作有利，固定性工作会产生厌恶。

感情：感情平稳，无刑、无冲，亦无桃花生肖，故感情不会有大变化。配偶或恋人会有置业念头、或有结婚打算。

健康：注意呼吸系统毛病和风湿骨疼症，和身体腰部以下疾病，不宜冷饮。

人缘：本年并非是非年，又无是非星，只要放开点，今年还算是不错的。

肖兔　　

今年与太岁相刑，人缘运欠佳，感情不稳。肖兔者相较其他生肖，今年要多听取各方意见作参考，不可冒进，开始进入大水年，因与太岁相刑，与人合作做生意更见小心对于一些日常文书往来更易出错，今年易犯是非、官非，作事紧慎为上。

财运：今年整体财运一般，没有预期理。会有财来财去的现象。在三、六、九、十二月财运较理想。

事业：上司对自已工作表现有不满，文件往来有误。开创事业多阻碍，做生意的朋友今年比打工的朋友运程较佳。

感情：今年个人比较爱出风头和爱面子，所以在感情上出现问题时会感情用事，和在一个不客观情况下作出错误决定影响关系。

健康：今年身体会多风湿骨痛或多感冒，如工作上与水有关易患脚痛之症。

人缘：太岁相刑，小人指背，是非不浅，要摆脱也不容易。

肖龙　　

今年为合太岁年，如果你今年突然来一段感情，则今年有婚嫁机会；已婚者亦有好处，因为与太岁合，所以人缘自然佳，做起事来更得心应手。又今年为大水年，故财运亦佳。

财运：本年得财机会较多和顺，但整体财运有可观增长。

事业：前面有山，用力前行，上班一族较稳定，从商者今年不能与人合作生意，亦不宜拓展业务。

感情：桃花年，感情、人缘佳，不论去年已分手或已有另一半的你，本年感情都相对较佳，大有谈婚论嫁的机会。已婚一族亦有人缘好，只要不对异性动心，就不会出问题。

健康：去年腹部、肠胃疾病会延至今年上半年，尤其是农历三月及六月，要小心饮食，免受腹疾之苦。

人缘：今年有女性小人，但是非会渐渐远离。凡事以和为贵

肖蛇

你今年较平稳，非桃花生肖，亦无相刑相冲相合犯太岁。与人合作计划可望预期完成，今年身心感吃力，有贵人暗助，上半年运程较佳、下半年较伤脑筋。

财运：本年财运一般，没有意外惊喜，亦不是破财年，只要按部就班，财运自然会慢慢增长。

事业：今年有贵人暗先苦后甜之年，好处是容易有贵人、长辈、上司之助，坏处是今年不会太积极，应该收拾心情，加一把劲。

感情：无刑无冲无桃花星，感情看不见任何变化，会保持现状，极为平稳。

健康：无刑无冲无病星，今年身体状况大致良好，注意有充足休息时间生活有序便可以，今年少饮酒为佳。

人缘：无风无浪，不用分神理会是非，也无须己人忧天，让它自生自灭即可。

肖马

今年为冲太岁年，易有迁移、外出、变化之象，或者搬屋，事业也容易出现大变化，不宜作新投资，事事以守为先，运程会逐步加强，尤其是三十及四十二岁者，宜把握机会稳守突击。又今年因冲太岁，易见损伤，要特别注意足、股、等部位，尤其在农历五月和十一月。

财运：本年财运两极化，财运会较保守，有好的投资机会亦只宜小作尝试，以短线为佳。上半年平平，下半年较佳，但因为发展机会多，花费亦会较多。

事业：今年为思想学习投资年，你以学习为佳，宜把握机会，有任何机会都要放胆尝试，不要犹豫太久。

感情：今年是感情变化年，故容易结婚，亦容易分手，今年一、四、七、十月都是感情较不稳定的月份。

健康：冲太岁年，易有损伤，子午相冲，要留意足、股，走路亦要加倍小心。慎防交通意外，事事忍让为先，最好在农历五月十一月避免驾驶，或捐血、验血、洗牙以应损伤。

人缘：冲代表动和变化，难免产生冲突，故本年宜以忍耐为上，别冲动损害人际关系。

肖羊

今年为太岁相害年，是非较多，人事不和，家庭不安，宜在东南位放一水养9枝红色花去化是非、旺人缘。因今年相害年，肾、膀胱、泌尿系统易出毛病，女性更要注意饮食，生冷之物宜少沾为妙。

财运：今年财旺之年，最为有利是在夏季。今年会有置业机会，或家中装修会增强财运。

事业：不论从商、自雇或上班一族都容易有发展机会，如上司或客户主动找你，故算是不错的一年。

感情：太岁相害，感情人缘差，感情则易出问题，尤其是农历六月和十一月要注意。

健康：本年太岁相害，不利肾、膀胱、泌尿系统，尤其是女性要更小心，生冷之物可免则免。

人缘：太岁相害，是非自然较多，但主要都是私人问题，而不是工作上的是非。

肖猴

本年为暗合太岁之生肖，贵人运佳，计划能得上司认同，今年创意无限，尽量利用发挥可有转机。今年多走动对财运有利。

财运：不错的一年，可把握机会，但今年财决不可露眼，否则易招贼？。

事业：今年为思想投资得财年，有新的投资机会，下半年时间最为有利。

感情：虽然不是桃花年，但太岁暗合，感情、人缘佳，已有另一半的你双方相处愉快，单身的你则今年容易出现暗恋对象，大有成功机会。

健康：无刑无冲亦无病星，故本年身心康泰，微恙不至，毋须挂虑。

人缘：太岁暗合，是非自然远离，所以本年有利交际应酬，宜多联络客户，搞好关系，对事业有间接帮助。

肖鸡

今年是与太岁相破之年，已婚者要珍惜眼前人，事业推上要有敬业乐业的态度，而单身者结识异性所展开新的感情不稳。因为本年为雾水桃花年，有结果的机会不大。不过因今年是桃花年间接对事业有帮助，不管上班一族、自雇或从商一族均能保抾往年优势，不致大大倒退。

财运：本年整体运程不差，但因理财不善导致财运有损，全是个人问题。已婚者可考虑太太管理，未婚者可考虑给父母管理。

事业：本年是权力地位提升年，对上班一族较有利，应努力争取，因先前所作的努力，今年应该会得到收获。

感情：今年是雾水桃花年，但终究也是桃花，能增进双方感情，算是不错的一年。

健康：本年身心康泰，没有什么部位要特别注意。而且凶星亦与身体无关，唯一要注意控制情绪，只要放松心情，不要斤斤计较即可。

人缘：桃花年，是非自然少，就算有都只是男女是非，尤其是已婚的你，莫因外来桃花影响双方感情，自寻烦恼。

肖狗

今年与太岁无冲、合，则小人无可发作，感情稳定。今年是你的桃花年，有结识异性的机会，不过双方感情虽稳，但闹意见的次数比平时多，尤其是农历三、六、九、十二月。今年财运不差。

财运：财运有进帐，下半年财运增加明显。

事业：今年宜把事业多元化，副业比正职的发展机会，可同时发展多项计划，与人合作期间留意财务问题。

感情：感情稳定，惟争吵月亦较多，故事事要忍让为先，勿令事情恶化。

健康：要多加注意皮肤问题，尤其平常已经容易皮肤敏感的你，今年容易出问题。要注意煎炸、燥热食物少沾为妙。

人缘：害人之心不可有，但防人之心不可无。理性处事。

肖猪

去年仍受犯太岁影响，这个影响要到农历正月过后才会逐渐消散，如果去年失落一段感情的话，今年要收拾心情，因为今年是水旺之年，容易出现对你有意思的人，去年胃肠问题严重，此问题会延续至今年，尤其是农历三、六月、九、十二月，要小心饮食。

财运：努力投入工作，本年可收复失地，因今年为土水流年，最利专业或收入不稳者，故工作属于多劳多得的最为有利。

事业：今年有利合作性的发展计划，原有计划可顺利进行同时有利益增长。最有利时间为冬季。

感情：肖猪的你今年为桃花生肖，感情方面较佳，已婚者双方相处愉快，单身者今年容易有一段新感情。

健康：胃肠问题上半年仍困扰着你，尤其是农历三月及六月，更要小心饮食，下半年后身体疾病渐渐减退，整体状况良好。

人缘：桃花年，感情人缘佳，是非自然减退，与去年犯太岁之情况刚好相反，只是农历三、六月是非较多。

不可错过五种上品男人

2008-02-05T18:30:00.000-08:00

1、感恩的男人

特征描述：这样的男人，会把别人对他们的一点好，牢记心头，他们的原则是滴水之恩涌泉相报。嫁这样的男人，你可以永远不必担心你的付出得不到回报，更不必担心糟糠之妻会下堂。世事变迁、沧海桑田，谁也不能保证自己会永远健康美丽富裕，但嫁给这样的男人，你至少可以确信，在你遇到艰难困苦的时候，他会与你同在。

2、有责任感的男人

特征描述：这个就不必多说了，谁不希望嫁个有责任有担当的男人呢？但这里要说的是对责任感也要有鉴别，责任感不是做以天下兴亡为己任状，而是对自己负责、对家人负责、对事业负责、对自己的现实生活负责。那些对自己的生活不负责一味忧国忧民的男人，也许只是一个现实的懦夫。

3、生活习惯良好的男人

特征描述：如果你是一个慵懒的娇娇女，那么一个生活习惯良好的男人绝对是你的最佳伴侣。这样的男人热爱整洁并且有一定的家务天分，你会发现有了他你的周围空间变得前所未有的舒适。一般来说少小离家、有照顾弟妹责任的长子、不太受宠的孩子比较容易有良好的生活习惯。家教肯定是重要的，但如果这种家教是以母亲的单方面劳碌形成的，当子女独立生活以后，他的生活习惯可能比一般人更糟糕。

4、心态健康的男人

特征描述：没有任何人能一生一世一帆风顺，也没有任何人能得到所有想要的东西，在现实的生活面前，健康的心态绝对要比绝的聪明、显赫的背景、突出的成就……都来的重要的多。

5、胸怀宽广的男人

特征描述：胸怀宽广，并不仅仅意味着对女孩子不计较不小心眼，更意味着对周围的人不贬低不诋毁不妒忌、对别人正确的意见能虚心接受。这样的男人不会来跟你算计房产证上写谁的名字、也不会自以为是自命不凡。

女孩在年轻的时候总是太看重“现在”：“现在”的他有多少钱有什么地位有什么资历有什么条件，“现在”的他是否能配得上我、“现在”选择他我是不是有面子，等等，却忽略了更为漫长的“未来”。事实上，从我所见所了解的，母亲辈和姐妹辈的亲身经历来看，没有任何外在的东西是可以维持三十年不变的，真正能让你幸福的，还是人与人之间的相濡以沫、执手偕老。

男人,能分泌雄性激素的人类。古人称为须眉，即长有胡须的人。
天分阴阳，即日月；人分阴阳，即男女。所以男人也代表着阳刚的意思，同时也是一种代表勇气与义气的一种赞许。比如说是个男性是一个真男人，也就是赞美他有勇气或者够义气。

男人是用泥做的，筑堤防洪用的最好的泥。所以就不管女人是不是水做的了。

看上了一个女孩该如何去追呢？

2008-02-05T18:25:00.000-08:00

不要怕,你的主动会带来她的反感,你不主动,她也不主动,也就慢慢淡下来了.如果你开始的表白被她拒绝,那也很正常呀.不要气馁,谁知道这个女孩子心里在想什么呢?

也许你再表白两次,她就会被你打动,一个心地善良的好女孩是很容易感动的.

如果你受到一次挫折,就立刻离开,再也不去答理这个女孩,把自己紧紧地保护起来,默默地舔舐伤口,在你痛苦的同时,殊不知,那个女孩子也许也正在心里遗憾, 后悔呢!也许她会偷偷哭泣,后悔拒绝了你,再看到你漠然的眼神,她也很痛心,但是她却不会对你说,绝对不会请求你回来追她.你的过度的自尊心, 可能会伤害了女孩子敏感的心.

她会认为你不是真诚的喜欢他,要不怎么会就这么放弃了她?

有人说,男生真难,追女孩子太不容易了.可是我的感觉却是,这种现象跟男人和女人的社会角色定位是分不开的,从生理和社会的角度,女人总是被动的.如果反过来,让男人都脉脉含羞, 女人变得勇往直前,世界才乱了套呢!女人的羞涩总是美好的,动人的呀~~~我总是听说是某个勇敢的男人战胜了多少困难,最终获得佳人芳心.相反的例子却少得很.

有的男生,就怕别人说自己什么死缠烂打,落下不好的名声.可是我觉得男生追求自己喜欢的女孩子,受了点挫折还继续对这个女孩子好,说明人家确实很喜欢,很有诚意,如果没成功,也不遗憾,并没什么啊?谁让人家喜欢了?最讨厌别人跟着瞎掺乎,也最讨厌那种自己没主意,过于在乎别人对自己看法的男生,活该这种男生找不到女朋友.

是男人就勇敢点,女孩子本来就感性,容易沉浸在爱情里.虽然你付出了辛苦,而一旦你的真心打动了她,那么你得到的将是更多更久的加倍的爱.这样的例子,在身边比比皆是.女孩子对自己的男朋友都是很温柔很贴心的,为了换来这份甜蜜,开头的辛苦算什么啊?而且大多好女孩都爱得挺投入挺专一的.

所以,建议有的男生勇敢一点,去追求自己喜欢的女孩子,不要那么畏畏缩缩,一来是让人觉得你没男人气概,二来是你自己怪难受的,然而最最最重要的还是:最后你什么都得不到.幸福总是自己挣来的,别指望别人施舍给你!

再补充一句,我觉得主动点儿挺好的,因为你的目标是你自己真心喜欢的,女孩子往往被动,被动的只能选择接受和拒绝,所以我宁愿主动出击,爱我所爱,无怨无悔

一、应该给MM留下什么样的第一印象（时间：刚开始接触MM）

1、我认为最关键的，是要让MM看到你的上进心。
男人的最大魅力在于事业有成，年轻人工作时间不长谈不上“有成”，这时候你就要让M

M觉得你是个有上进心的人。
别的可以胡说八道，但这个问题不能含糊，你一定要告诉MM，你对未来充满信心，你不满足于现状，并且你已经有了长远的计划，总之你的未来不是梦。

2、要显得有信心、有责任心
不要像个小孩子，女孩子都很懒希望能找个依靠，你要拿出自己的信心和责任心来。
有一个错的选择总比没有选择要好的多。

3、不要太正经，但也不要太随便
该正经的地方就正经，该调侃的的时候就调侃。
女孩子都喜欢有点玩世不恭的男人，所以别显得对什么都特别在意，那样太呆板。

4、显得成熟一点
遇事镇定、从容不迫的男人对MM有致命的吸引力。

二、如何与MM展开进一步接触（时间：开始追的阶段）

1、这个阶段最关键的是不能着急，不要把事情弄的那么清楚，让人家一眼就能看出你在

追人家。
想一想，一般人都不会一眼就看上你，但也不会看一眼就讨厌你，都是老百姓家的孩子（

除非你长得象周润发刘德华或者凯文科斯特纳），好感是需要随着了解的不断增加而实现

的，所以问题的关键是你要得的进一步发展的机会。
站在女孩子的角度替人家想一想：你这么直接了当的冲过来要搞对象，女孩子肯定有心理

压力。这要是接触一阵后发现不喜欢你，那不就成了耍你了么？所以如果你开始就摆出志

在必得的姿势出来，基本上会被立刻闷回去。

2、要低姿态起步
首先要把关系定位成“朋友”，本来是“普通朋友”，你希望成为“好朋友”，有品位的

还可以要求对方成为“红颜知己”什么的，总之千万不要说“追你”。
你想想，你如果根本不提“追”，那么女孩子也就更没机会“拒绝”你——你没追她怎么

拒绝你？！
这样可以减轻女孩子的心理压力，使你们能顺利的交往下去。不要幻想认识三天就答应嫁

给你，要充分的交往、了解，感情不是凭空产生的。

3、交往的过程中不要太急躁
要有张有弛，不要整天缠着人家，谁这样对你，你也会腻。我有个好朋友对我说，追女孩

子的关键是八个字—— “忽冷忽热、欲擒故纵”（这是我同学多少年心血的结晶）。

你整天缠着人家自然不觉得你好，你适当的冷个一两天，女孩子就会想起你在的好处了。

还有就是不要拿出“非你不娶”的志气来，太掉价了不好，有时候可以耍点花招。

4、要适当的创造机会
前面说了，不要使事情立刻变成“你在追别人”，而你又需要得到接近女孩子的机会，这

时就要看你的创造力了。
你可以搜集情报，想办法把守株待兔变成一场邂逅；也可以装做漫不经心的找出最最充足

的理由邀请对方和你一起做什么事。
总之这个是最有技术含量的地方，实在不行可以找前辈请教。

5、切忌切忌：随便送人家礼物是不礼貌的
有些人追女孩子心切，喜欢经常买东西送人家，殊不知追女孩子最忌讳这个。
俗话说“无功不受禄”，你这样送人家东西就是在施加压力，人家会觉得欠你的，所以会
想办法还给你，如果没办法还给你就会想办法不和你交往，免得总是欠你人情。
如果你想显示自己的诚意，倒不妨请女孩子一起消费，比如说找好的餐厅吃饭，或者找贵

的地方一起玩什么的，女孩子自然能看出你花了很多钱，但钱终究是两个人一起花了而不

是变成东西带回家。

三、“女朋友”到底是什么？

1、“女朋友”是一种事实，而不是一份承诺
你和女孩子开始交往，从“普通朋友”变成“好朋友”，再到“非常非常好、无话不谈的

朋友”，某一个阳光灿烂的午后，你“不小心”拉了她的手；“月上柳梢头”，你突然袭

击吻了她。这时她就已经是你的女朋友了，无论她是否承认，她心理已经认为你是他男朋

友了。
我知道最高明的，直到上床了都没问过“你是否愿意做我女朋友”，最后还是女孩子急了
：“你怎么还不求我做你女朋友啊！”
所以说，千万不要急于把窗户纸捅破，情况越朦胧对你越有利。

2、“表白”是什么？
前面说了，表白实际上就是一个形式而已，正确的顺序应该是：事实上已经成为你女朋友
了，你才能向人家表白，水到渠成。很多人弄不明白这个问题，总以为人家先答应做自
己女朋友，然后再如何如何，我只能说
他非常非常“单纯”，也非常非常“愚蠢”。

3、有没有“迫不得已非表白不可”的时候？

有，比如说出现第三者，或者你和女孩子关系没有成熟但两个人可能分开一段时间。
这时候的表白就是条件不成熟的表白，风险非常大，类似于下围棋的时候形势严峻，落后

的一方迫于无奈放出“胜负手”，赢了就赢了，输了也只能说“倒霉都是天生的”。

4、“爱”字不要轻易出口
经常看见论坛出现“大胆的表白”，说实话我真的认为这是非常不成熟的一种表现。“爱

”是一个神圣的字，意味着追求，也意味着承诺，甚至体现出一种责任。
随便说“爱”的男人是不负责任的。

四、文明恋爱，不可强求

1、不是每个MM都能追到手的
好女孩子总会有很多人追，不可能遂了每个人的心愿，总会有失败者。举个例子，就算你

刻苦钻研掌握了最搞超的追MM原理，你一样追不上TWINS里的任何一个。
换个角度考虑问题，一个小学没毕业的农村小保姆，即使对你再好，每个月赚600给你买

700的礼物（透支），愿意为你“当牛做马”，你也不会爱上她。如果她每天哭哭啼啼的缠
着，你肯定觉得烦。
所以说爱情是需要物质基础的，至少需要平衡。

2、追MM做是一种严肃的社会活动
千万不要把人家搞烦了，要给自己留后路。大丈夫何患无妻？有些MM确实势利眼（少数）

，如果不服气，你可以发愤图强，用事实证明“她当时瞎了眼”，绝对不要误人误己。

最后补充一点千万不要在MM面前显得愤世嫉俗，愤世嫉俗有时候意味着“你很失败”。

男生有了女朋友后的20个惨状

2008-02-05T18:01:00.000-08:00

一、没认识你之前我拿奖学金，认识你之后我差点补考。

二、我忍着让别人笑话的耻辱给你洗衣服。

三、一个苹果，都给你吃。两个苹果，我把大的给你吃。

四、同吃一条鱼，我让你吃鱼肉，我自己吃鱼头。

五、你这么难看，我还说你漂亮。我这么帅，你还说我难看。

六、出去玩都是我花钱，回来我只能吃萝卜（你省下钱当然可以自己吃鱼翅了）。

七、认识你之前我没交过女朋友。认识我之前你交了两个男朋友。

八、你生气时，我让你当出气筒。我生气时，我把自己当出气筒。

九、你想吻我的时候就可以吻我。我想吻你的时候还要经过你同意。

十、你经常打我，我从来没有打过你。

十一、有一次你问我如果你爱上别的男人了我会怎样，我说我要杀了那个男的。我又问你如果我爱上了别的女人了你会怎样，你说你要阉了我。

十二、我买了200块的衣服给你，骗你才50块。你买了30块的手表给我，骗我要300块。

十三、我把你的耳机用坏了，我买新的赔你。你把我的自行车丢了，连句对不起也没说。

十四、你生病一次，我要瘦两斤。我生病一次，你反而胖两斤（你来寝室陪我，吃光了我所有的零食。）

十五、我没嫌你矮，你却嫌我高。

十六、你来我家，我睡沙发。我去你家，还是我睡沙发。

十七、那次去看露天演唱会，你骑在我头上看得津津有味，我被你压在下面在人群中流泪。

十八、我家的狗生了，我把最好看的一条送给你。你却把你养得快要死掉的金鱼送给我，害我才养两天就得给它们送终。

十九、我给你洗了N次的袜子，从未给你丢过一只。你只在我生病的时候给我洗了两双袜子，就各丢一只。

二十、我陪你去买东西时我主动帮你提东西，你却从来没问过要不要帮我提东西。

男人最讨厌的女人的缺点

2008-02-05T17:46:00.000-08:00

1.最讨厌像小孩子一样的女人,从小被家里人跟宝一样宠大.娇生惯养的女人,让人觉得不知道是谈恋爱还是照顾一个小孩.

2.最讨厌动不动就翻脸的女人,只能开别人的玩笑,别人一开她的玩笑,自己就翻脸.丢不丢人,好歹是个女孩子哎,这么丢人.

3.最讨厌整天想着要买着买那的女人.最让人无法接受的女人,天天说我什么时候逛街时买了这买了那,买回来那种垃圾货,毫无品位用起来一点都不配自己的东西,只会盲目的跟着流行跑.喜欢这个喜欢那个,要买这个要买那个,不会听取你的建议.一听到你给她的建议就会说你老土,不懂行情,跟不上潮流,现在外面都流行这个...恐怕她只有跟着所谓的流行屁股后头跑的女人了

4.最讨厌自私的女人.她心情好的时候,必须让你随时去陪她,陪她逛街,买东西,吃饭,可笑的是当她心情不好的时候你要想尽办法让她开心,当她的出气筒,宣泄对象,而后她还要说你这不是那不是,借题发挥,打击你那颗真诚的心.哎!好心当成驴肝肺.

5.最讨厌虚伪的女人.当她想离开你的时候她会对你说我父母不同意,其实却是她跟你时间呆长了厌倦了,没有新鲜感了,甚至觉得你让她讨厌了,最后却对你说她是多么的爱你,你是她世界上最爱的人,但是父母不同意我也没办法,让人觉得可笑.

6.最讨厌以自以为是的女人.每次都以为自己长的漂亮有个漂亮脸蛋,魔鬼身材就以为男人应该让着她,迁就她,都要听她的,不然的话她会说你不喜欢有是人喜欢,本小姐天生丽质,你不要有的是人要.

7.最讨厌耿耿于怀的女人.哪怕多少年前你谈过的女朋友,你对她的保证彼此早已经结束,现在只是普通朋友,可是无论过去多少年,只要吵架,就会把那件事提出来的女人.

8.最讨厌斤斤计较女人.为了一点点小事就和你吵架的女人,甚至于那件事情跟本与你毫不相干,难怪别人会说女人最擅长的就是把2件不相干的事情牵连在一起,而且动不动就说,如果我不好,你可以找别人呀,之类的傻X的话的女人.

9. 最讨厌虚荣心强的女人.也许女人会有一种攀比心里,所以每次她在朋友面前都有意无意的炫耀一翻,自己最近买了什么什么东西,还时不时的对别人做一翻评价, 其实也是想台高自己,衬托出自己,先把绿叶夸奖一翻,然后再告诉别人她是鲜花.你劝劝她,她还理直气壮的说你丢人,让她很没面子之类的话,然后自己在那里发干活的勺女人.

10.也是本人最讨厌的女人.最讨厌让男人伤心的坏女人.伤害了男人却不知道自己错在哪,然后假惺惺的问,我又杂了.然后离开的,一错就跑开了,好多天不联系,连个留言,或者短信都没有的自私,你联系她她也爱搭不理,等你主动找到她的时候她就当什么事情也没有发生,跟个没事人一样,甚至会认为错的人是你,得了便宜还卖乖,更让人无法接受的是她在现实中对男人有看法也就算了,还喜欢到处宣传自己的观点,认为这就是对的,这就是真理.十大合体的最恶心,最让人讨厌的女人.

与老婆吵架的10大好处

2008-02-05T17:38:00.000-08:00

1.最大的好处就是可以暂时不必在宝贵的双休日里陪老婆逛百货公司，省下许多手提大包小包鞍前马后的奔波之苦。

2.在有好球赛的晚上，可以左手花生右手啤酒，连喊带叫地看到眼皮发沉，而不用担心中途会有人来抢遥控器逼着你看连续剧。

3.能在较集中的几天里品尝各种品牌和风味的方便面，对不同产品的特点了如指掌。

4.如偶然有女同事打来电话，可以既温柔又大方地和对方多聊上几句，而不用担心事后要指天发誓跟那个女的只是同事关系。

5.自己洗衣服，能够在一天之内学会洗衣机的操作方法，并对不同质地的衣服采用何种洗涤剂进行全面了解，增长知识，开阔视野。

6.睡觉场所暂时从卧室转移到客厅沙发上，得到的优惠条件是不必每天睡前洗脚。

7.可以无所顾忌地和铁哥们聚会，即使神侃到三更天也不会有人催你回家，不但巩固了友谊，而且重温了当年毛头小伙儿的单身生活。

8.走在马路上，有漂亮女孩从身边经过时，可以大胆地多看几眼，不用害怕会被拧耳朵。

9.邻居敲门喊三缺一时，可以立即给予肯定答复，不用唯唯诺诺向老婆请示。

10.挑一件精美的礼物再说几句甜言蜜语向老婆低头认错，既提高审美水平锻炼口才，又能享受和好后的幸福生活。

Eazo’s custom-designed high-end luxury PCs

2008-01-31T05:12:00.000-08:00

Still drooling over the $760,000 pure platinum Zeus Jupiter luxury PC? Well, if you are looking for a good alternate to the same, but at a bit reasonable price tag, you need to check out the custom luxury desktops being offered by China’s custom PC luxury brand Eazo. They are combining traditional Chinese design and western technology to achieve the personal computing perfection. One of their machines dubbed X70, priced at a cool $45,500, features a 3GHz Q9550 Core 2 Quad processor, two NVIDIA 8800GTX graphics cards, 4GB of RAM, light-up liquid cooling, a 10,000rpm 150GB drive, 7,200rpm 500GB drive, 7.1-channel sound, and Windows Vista Ultimate. You also have the option to custom configure your dream system and that could cost you around $70,000. In the last quarter of 2007, Eazo introduced three new designs dubbed M20 and X20, Fiji XCS70. The Eazo PCs tout magnesium alloy chassis, which is further painted with natural Chinese lacquer with no chemical additives. This lacquer has been long valued for its inimitable color, texture, and anti-corrosive properties. Each and every PC model is unique is its own way and comes packed with state-of-the-art hardware components. Do check out the picture gallery to see the stylish custom luxury PCs from the house.

Funny SMS - 2

2008-01-30T21:57:00.000-08:00

Birds love u, Giraffe love u, Goat love u, Elephant love u, Go to zoo, They all miss u.

I want U 2 know dat our friendship means a lot 2 me. U cry I cry, U Lauf I Lauf, U Jump out of da window… I look down & den.. I lauf again

Eyes: To look at you Hands: To pray for you Mind: To care for u Heart: To love you and Legs: To kick u if u forget me.

A group of elephants were sitting on the street. A sexy female elephant passes by… What does the loafer elephant say? Wow… 3600-2400-3600

Based on Newton’s 1st Law: Law of love Love neither be created nor be destroyed, only it can be changed frm one girlfriend to another girlfriend.

When u get ths SMS, snd it to 1 person U luv, 1 u hate, 1 u always think of & 1 u wish to kill. now keep guessing why I send it to u!!

I saw U on Road today. U were lukin SO fine, Ur face SO divine, Ur walk SO perfect. My Heart started singing a Sweet Song: Who Let The Dogs Out!

Do u know that your Smile takes 1000 People to Death ? Save The World……… So Plz start brushing regularly

A small kid wrote to Santa Clause, “send me a brother”. santa wrote back, “send me ur mother”.

Scientists all over the world r wondering how long a human being can live without a brain… Kindly tell them ur age…

The Police are looking for a suspect who is smart, sexy, witty & very good looking… So where are you gonna hide Me?

I look at the moon, the moon is beautiful… I look at you.. I.. I… I’d rather look at the moon again.

so sweet is ur SMILE….. so sweet is ur STYLE….. so sweet is ur VOICE….. so sweet is ur EYE……. see how sweetly I LIE!!

I want u… To be with me In a nice Restaurent To have candle light dinner…. & to say say those sweet three words to U…. “Pay The Bill”

Don’t feel sad, don’t feel glue, Einstein was ugly too !

Hello I am a virus and I am entering your brain right now….. sorry I will leave, I can’t find a brain.

Researcher are finding the ugliest person to investigate how this
effect on rats and devils. So friend, be careful, I'm afraid they could find you.

女人会为哪种男人献身

2008-01-30T21:34:00.000-08:00

有句话我一辈子都不会忘记，“如果女人的一生只有一个男人，就像一首乐章只有一个音符。”只有一个音符无疑是单调得不成章的，那么姐妹们，你们愿意自已的一生只是do，或者re吗？

我觉得女人可以把身体献给这样的男人：

　　一、有情有义有始有终的男人

　　从喜欢上你的第一天起，你就是他的全部，你是地球，他就是月亮，你的笑脸就是他的好心情。有了你，他不会再把视线转移到别的女性身上，服侍你是他的终身事业。遇到这样的男人，不要计较他有没有钱，有没有地位，有什么好的工作，跟他一辈子，就是幸福。

　　二、浪漫温情优雅高贵的男人

　　他的袖口永远扎得那样整齐，皮鞋上永远不会沾染灰尘，没有一句粗俗的话语，永远那样沉着，洒脱，微笑的在你需要的时候出现。这样的男人可遇不可求，也许你们只有一起喝咖啡或者赏月的缘份，但是他的贵族气质，绅士风度会让你留恋一辈子，所以碰到这样的男人，如果氛围适合，情调相宜，不要拒绝，也不要犹豫。

　　三、性格爽直豪放粗犷的男人

　　也许他不拘小节，爱耍贫嘴，常爱惹你生气，可有人欺侮人的时候，他会用坚实的臂膀来保护你。他为了你努力工作，为了你做许多傻事却不让你知道，他受伤了也不要你担心，他爱在女人中间周旋，喝醉了甚至跟别的女人上床，可是最疼爱的还是你。在这种爱的保护下，女人会更像小女人，如果你喜欢做小女人的话，跟他吧。

　　四、文弱古板性格木讷的男人

　　这种男人是男人中的璞玉，需要耐心的雕琢。他们相信爱情，沉迷于爱情，却不会表达爱情。

　　也许他不太懂得生活，常把现实与书本相比较，可是他真诚，他不会在你的每一话去寻找话外音，他可以一辈子只要你一个女人。如果你贫穷，他愿意为你改变，如果你富有，他会是个更优秀的男人。因为不管对待家庭还是事业，他都会用积极向上的心态去面对。虽然他不会讲笑话，可是他也许会写一些让你感动的诗，他害怕跟别的女生交往，你的怀抱就是他最舒心的最自在的场所，找个这样的男人，如果你是个心态复杂的女人。

　　五、自命不凡骄横跋扈

　　这种男人在每一种事情上都会自以为是，他不听取任何人的意见，也可以说他很有见解。这种男人独立性强，为他献身其次，重要的是要征服他，让他成为你的人。如果成功的话，他就会是个脱胎换骨的千金不换的回头浪子。这样的男人通常成为成功男的概率是百分之九十九点几，如果跟了他，也许也下辈子什么都不用愁了。

　　六、处男

　　其实女人跟男人一样，女人也有处男情结，现代社会男人这么放荡，如果有个处男摆在你面前的话，不用说，送给你八个字，“宁可错上，也不放过”。据说，男人对自已的第一个女人会有一种难以割舍的复杂的倦念。如果能得到这样的男人，他也许会因为失身与你而忽视你身上所有的缺点，然后学着成年的男人照顾你，爱护你，还会偶尔在你面前撒撒娇，因为第一次他并不强大，可是只有你知道。想当大女人的话，找处男吧。

真正超级色鬼

2008-01-30T21:30:00.001-08:00

问色鬼：“何为人之最大乐事”？

答曰：“行房事！”

又问：“此后呢？”

思索良久答曰：“再行房事！”

成人笑话

2008-01-30T21:27:00.000-08:00

1、某男看到一则广告：不开刀、不住院、让你的生殖器轻轻松松变大变粗！顿大喜，立即汇款。数日，收到邮包，急切地打开一看！！原来是一放大镜！　　　　　　

2、牧师问一对夫妇：如果五分钟后就到世界末日，你们想做什么事？丈夫兴致勃勃地回答：想做爱。太太白他一眼幽幽地说：那剩下的四分钟干什么？　　　　　　

3、俩屎壳螂讨论福利彩票，甲说:我要中了大奖就把方圆50里的厕所都买下来，每天吃个够！乙说:你丫太俗了！我要是中了大奖就包一活人，每天吃新鲜的！　　　　　　

4、洞房花烛夜的早晨，新郎一觉醒来，发现新娘泪流满面。惊讶问:心肝，为啥哭？新娘哭到:以后的日子怎么过？你那玩意儿用了一夜已经缩小到不成样子了！以后咋办呢！　　　　　

5、一老头乘公交去高潮村办事。途中问女服务员:高潮到了没？女服务员:还没呢。一会儿他又问:高潮到了没？服务员说:糟老头急什么，高潮到了我会叫的！　　　　　

6、老婆打麻将至凌晨回家，为了不扰醒丈夫，她先在客厅里脱光了衣服再进卧室。恰遇丈夫醒来，见了大怒到:太过份了！你竟输的精光？　　　　　　　

7、一小姐吃饭时点了道爆炒鞭花,夹菜时不慎掉到两腿之间,小姐大惊:这玩意真厉害!煮熟了剁碎了,它竟还认识路!　　　　　

8、一男青年在公交车上看到一美女的衣领开得很低,春光外泄,戏言道‘真是桃花盛开的地方啊’,美女听后,撩起裙子说:‘还有生你养你的地方’! 　　　　

9、一对男女正在做爱,女的忽然跳下床,跑进厨房从米缸里抓了一把米,回来撒到男的身上,气哼哼地说:少在这里丢人现眼,回去去把小鸡喂大再来吧!　　　　

10、村妇报案说:丢人那!俺昨晚被强*了.警察问他那人长啥样?那俺可没看清楚,不过肯定是个新手,因为他半天找不着地方,最后还是俺给他扶进去的. 　　　　

11、狐狸爱上了兔子,约？去喝啤酒,兔子醉了,狐狸趁机把兔子给强*了,过了几天狐狸又叫兔子去喝酒,兔子说:‘哎!不去了!不去了!,喝完啤酒屁股疼’　　　　　

12、少女夜半归家,遭七暴徒,危险时一大妈挺身而出,救走少女自遭轮*,电台采访,大妈言：其实当时啥也没想,只想这点好事可不能全便宜了那小骚娘们儿!　　　

13.某村妇首次进城，欲上茅厕，良久未遇，无奈求助警察：同志，前面有个公厕，请问母厕在哪？

14,男青年抚摸着女友穿着迷你裙的大腿：亲爱的，我爱你！女友被爱抚得神魂颠倒：再，再高一点儿！男青年提高嗓门：亲爱的，我爱你！

15、监狱长问话，犯人说:床前明月光，没钱憋的慌，举头望银行，低头进班房。监狱长：出世几十年，兜里没有钱，抢个小银行，关了好几年.

16、一小孩在河边发现一女尸，于是报警说：河边一女人被打死，胸前两个大包，两腿间被砍了一刀出血很多，估计死亡时间过长，被砍处已经开始长毛了　

Key tip for stress relief - Get a good nihgt's sleep

2008-01-30T06:11:00.000-08:00

Tired? Stressed? It's time to rest. The best rest occurs at night. It does not matter whether you go to bed early or late as long as you are obeying your own natural sleep pattern.

Happy nights: lack of sleep is, in itself, a source of stress. Worse still, when we do not get enough sleep or sleep badly, we are less able to resist daytime pressures and they upset us more than they would normally. To avoid this slow wearing down process, we need a good night's sleep. The answer is simple: learn to obey your natural sleep pattern.

DID YOU KNOW?
> Sleep occurs in approximately one and a half hour cycles, which are repeated throughout the night. If you miss your bedtime, go to bed when you are ready and get up at the same time the next day.
> A short relaxation session before going to bed may help you to get to sleep more easily.

Keep a sleep diary: the need for sleep obeys a precise biological clock which varies according to the individual. There is no firm rule: some people need nine or ten hours sleep, while others can get by on five or six. To understand your own biological clock, keep a sleep diary: every day make a note of when you begin to feel sleepy. After a few days you will see a pattern emerging. That is your bedtime.

KEY FACTS

Lack of sleep is a source of stress.

To sleep well you need to keep to your personal sleep rhythms.

Keep a diary to find our your ideal bedtime.

Key tip for stress relief - Don't skip breakfast

2008-01-30T05:57:00.000-08:00

It's the first meal of the day and perhaps the most important, especially during periods of stress. So that the time to have a good breakfast!

Replenish your reserves: at night our organism functions on the reserves built up during the day. Processes like breathing, heartbeat and the filtration of waste materials through the kidneys gradually exhaust them. In the morning the reserves need to be replaced. This is what breakfast does. Firstly, it restores energy to the body's organs, especially the brain, then it provides the muscles with proteins and finally, it supplies us with water and essential nutriments like vitamins, minerals and fatty acids.

DID YOU KNOW?
>Breakfast is also a time when the family can be together. Afterwards, parents and children often leave each other for the rest of the day.
>All the more reason to take trouble over breakfast and eat the meal together at the table without hurrying.

A quarter of your daily calorie intake: that is what a good breakfast should be (400-500 calories). It must be balanced: an egg or some ham (proteins), cereals or bread (complex carbohydrates which are absorbed slowly), jam or honey (simple carbohydrates which are absorbed rapidly), butter (fatty acids), fruit juice or fresh fruit (vitamins), milk or natural yoghurt (calcium), a drink (tea or coffee). Above all, avoid too much sugar and fat (sweet pastries, sugar milk products).

KEY FATS

Breakfast restores the reserves of energy which are used up during the night.

It should be a quarter of the daily calorie intake.

Different

2008-01-29T23:35:00.000-08:00

February Diary

2008-01-29T19:37:00.001-08:00

Paradigm Studio Esprit Hybrid On-Wall Speakers

2008-01-29T18:11:00.000-08:00

Designed to harmonize a range of aesthetics, the sophisticated Paradigm Studio Esprit Hybrid on-wall speakers offers multiple placement options without sacrificing sonic fineness. Launched in Q4 of last year, the Paradigm’s Esprit on-wall speakers are the just right thing for your home theater, no matter if you have your TV sitting on a stand or mounted on a wall. Its state-of-the-art Studio Series v.4 technology and proprietary speech sheet make for an outstanding hybrid on-wall speaker. When wall-mounted, the speaker’s correct on-wall response is automatically activated to guarantee natural, uncolored delivery of music. When mounted on the GS-40 stand, the speaker automatically adjusts sound for correct free-air frequency response to maintain superior performance. Each Esprit model features adjustable wall-mounting brackets that allow for angling and tilting of the speakers. A three-way crossover design throws in to exceptional on- and off-axis dispersion, extended dynamic range and seamless timbre matching between front and center speakers and matching surround/rear speakers.

Paradigm’s Reference Studio Esprit models come in a choice of wood veneers, including a cherry wood veneer inlay with silver cabinet and gray grille or a rosenut wood veneer inlay with dark gray cabinet and black grille. Paradigm also offers a lacquered piano black inlay with dark gray cabinet and black grille. Priced at a mere US $1099 for a set.

$50,000 Fish Art Coffee Table

2008-01-28T23:44:00.000-08:00

A coffee table adds beauty and elegance to any room it adorns. Be bold and choose a coffee table that contrasts with a room or be bit subtle and get one that’s more functional than attractive. Check out the gorgeous $50,000 Fish Art Coffee Table. The table is shaped like fish and almost every facet of it represents marine life. The body is birch ply and the table top frame has been casted in epoxy 20 coats of finish throughout. There is a remote controlled, battery operated Spring-loaded safety switch for top insert panel. The design, art work, assembly and everything is done by DLT Designs Inc. The mono print oil-on-canvas is laminated on the table base and top panel. The Fish Art Coffee Table costs a fortune, but its ingenious design does compensate for that stocky price tag.

Important to have friend

2008-01-28T23:28:00.001-08:00

Carlsberg's Vintage No.1- Say Cheers to the world’s most expensive beer!

2008-01-28T00:25:00.001-08:00

A fine beer may be judged with only one sip, but it’s better to be thoroughly sure. While wines have always been a part of the fine dining experience, beer sounds like its poor cousin! Well, not anymore. Carlsberg, Scandinavia’s biggest brewer has introduced Vintage No.1, world’s most expensive beer that’ll sell for $400. The designer beer has a chestnut brown color, little foam and hints of prune, caramel, vanilla and oak tree from the French and Swedish wooden casks in which it is stored. The beer goes well with cheeses and desserts according to the brewer. The exclusivity comes from the fact only 600 bottles of the 10.5 percent proof beer, each of 37.5 centiliters (0.8 pint) is on sale for 2008 with newer versions expected to hit the market in the following years. Vintage No.1 beats its nearest rival,Boston Beer Co.’s Utopia which held the No.1 spot of the most expensive beer so far. If luxury is your second name, try the beer before it disappears off the shelves.

Aquavision readies Big Daddy of all waterproof TVs

2008-01-28T00:23:00.000-08:00

A modern-day luxury bathroom is incomplete without a waterproof LCD TV. Aquavision is most probably the first name what strikes us when we talk about waterproof LCD TVs for bathrooms, showers, kitchens and other wet environments. Bigger is always better in case of TVs, but till the date we haven’t seen the really big waterproof bathroom TVs. In the near future, you could have a huge 57-inch waterproof LCD TV hanging on the wall of your bathroom. Yes, Aquavision has announced to unveil the waterproof LCD TV of the future at this year’s ISE Show (Integrated Systems Europe 2008, Amsterdam) from January 29 to 31. Dubbed AVF 57-4LCD, it has Full HD 1920 x 1080 resolution, analogue and digital tuners, two HDMI inputs, claimed 2,073,000 pixels, and a waterproof remote control. When the TV is off, the screen turns into a mirror when it’s for your morning make-up. Hope you have a plenty of space inside your bathroom to house the waterproof beauty. Anyway, you can hang it almost anywhere, say your swimming pool or living room. Get ready folks, the big daddy of all the bathroom TVs is coming.

九种食物多吃会死人的哦

2008-01-26T06:49:00.001-08:00

1)皮蛋：
一般制造商在制作皮蛋时，常添加定量的铅，我们若经常食用，会引起铅中毒。同时，还会造成身体内钙质的流失。

2)臭豆腐：
臭豆腐在发酵过程中，极易被微生物污染，同时又会挥发大量盐基氮。

)味精：
每人每日对味精的摄取量，以不超过六公克为原则，多则有害无益

4)菠菜：
菠菜营养丰富，但因含有草酸，致食物中宝贵的元素锌与钙之结合，而被排出体外，而引起人体锌与钙的缺乏。(男人缺锌，会无法抬头作人，恐怖啊！) ，以及硫化氢等；这些都是蛋白质分解的腐败物质，对人体有害。

5)猪肝：
一公斤的猪肝，其含胆固醇高达四百毫克以上，而一个人若摄固醇，会导致动脉硬化。

6)烤肉：
由于烤肉在熏烤过程中，会产生如“苯”等有害物质，是诱发癌的因子。

7)腌菜：
腌菜若制作不得法，含致癌物，并含硝酸胺，久吃因而致病

8)油条
油条中的明矾，是含铝的无机物，不可经常食用。

9)馒头：

吃多了也会撑死人的！

30种经典爱情名言

2008-01-26T06:33:00.000-08:00

1.不要为了寂寞去恋爱，时间是个魔鬼，天长日久，如果你是个多情的人，即使不爱对方，到时候也会产生感情，到最后你怎么办？

2.不管多大多老，不管家人朋友怎么催，都不要随便对待婚姻不是打牌，重新洗牌要付出巨大代价。

3.感情的事基本上没有谁对谁错，他（她）要离开你，总是你有什么地方不能令他满足，回头想想过去在一起的日子，总是美好的。当然，卑劣的感情骗子也有，他们的花言巧语完全是为了骗取对方和自己上床，这样的人还是极少数。

4.和一个生活习惯有很多差异的人恋爱不要紧，结婚要慎重，想想你是否可以长久忍受彼此的不同。

5.在要求对方必须是处女的时候，想想自己是不是处男，如果是，你可以，如果不是，你凭什么？

6.不要随便和别人上床，否则将来遇到一个真爱但他洁身自好有原则的男人，你会后悔当年的所做所为。

7. 不要因为自己长相不如对方而放弃追求的打算，长相只是一时的印象，真正决定能否结合主要取决于双方的性格。我见过的帅哥配丑女，丑女配帅哥的太多了。

8. 离婚率高至少反映了好坏不同的两点?好的一点是人们的观念已经趋向人性化，不再为封建思想而禁锢自己，坏的一点是对于婚姻的轻率。没想好结什么婚？

9. 只会读书的女人是一本字典，再好人们也只会在需要的时候去翻看一下，只会扮靓的女人只是一具花瓶，看久了也就那样。服饰美容是做好一个女人的必要条件，不是充要条件。你还需要多看书。这样你会发现生活更加美好。

10. 草率地结了婚已经是错了，再也不要草率地去离婚。先试试看，真的不行再离也不迟。

11. 经常听说男人味女人味，你知道男人味是一种什么味道，女人味又是一种什幺味道吗？男人味就是豁达勇敢，女人味就是温柔体贴。

12. 魅力是什么？魅力不是漂亮，漂亮的女人不一定能吸引我，端庄幽雅的女人我才喜欢。所以你不用担心自己不够漂亮。

13. 初恋都让人难忘，觉得美好。为什么？不是因为他（她）很漂亮或很帅，也不是因为得不到的就是好的，而是因为人初涉爱河时心里异常纯真，绝无私心杂念，只知道倾己所有去爱对方。而以后的爱情都没有这么纯洁无瑕了。纯真是人世间最为可贵的东西。我们渴求的就是她。

14. 初恋的人大多都不懂爱，所以初恋失败的多。成功的少。结婚应该找个未婚的，因为谁都喜欢原装。

15. 男人有钱就变坏，是的，很多男人这样，不过，一有钱就变坏的男人就算没钱，也好不到哪里去。

16. 天长地久有没有？当然有！为什么大多数人不相信有？因为他们没有找到人生旅途中最适合自己的那一个。也就是冥冥中注定的那一个。为什么找不到？茫茫人海，人生如露，要找到最合适自己的那一个谈何容易？你或许可以在40岁时找到上天注定的那一个，可是你能等到40岁吗？在20多岁时找不到，却不得不结婚，在三四十岁时找到却不得不放弃。这就是人生的悲哀。

17. 和聪明的人恋爱会很快乐，因为他们幽默，会说话，但也时时存在着危机，因为这样的人很容易变心。和老实的人恋爱会很放心，但生活却也非常得乏味。

18. 有的人老是抱怨找不好人，一两次不要紧，多了就有问题了，首先你要检讨自己本身有没有问题，如果没有，那你就要审视一下自己的眼光了，为什么每次坏人总被你碰到？

19. 有人说男人一旦变心，九头牛也拉不回，难道女人变心，九头牛就拉得回来吗？男女之间只在生理上有差异，心理方面大同小异。

20. 如果真爱一个人，就会心甘情愿为他而改变。如果一个人在你面前我行我素，置你不喜欢的行为而不顾，那么他就是不爱你。所以如果你不够关心他或是他不够关心你，那么你就不爱他或他不爱你，而不要以为是自己本来就很粗心或相信他是一个粗心的人。遇见自己真爱的人，懦夫也会变勇敢，同理，粗心鬼也会变得细心。

21. 彼此都有意而不说出来是爱情的最高境界。因为这个时候两人都在尽情的享受媚眼，尽情的享受目光相对时的火热心理，尽情的享受手指相碰时的惊心动魄。一旦说出来，味道会淡许多，因为两人同意以后，所有的行为都是已被许可，已有心理准备的了，到最后渐渐会变得麻木。

22. 一个萝卜一个坑，说的是婚姻情况。事实上对于爱情来说，是不成立的，优秀的人，不管男女，都会是一个萝卜好几个坑。所以这个世界天天上演着悲欢离合的故事

23. 有两种女人很可爱，一种是妈妈型的，很体贴人，很会照顾人，会把男人照顾的非常周到。和这样的女人在一起，会感觉到强烈的被爱。还有一种是妹妹型的。很胆小，很害羞，非常的依赖男人，和这样的女人在一起，会激发自己男人的个性的显现。比如打老鼠扛重物什么的。会常常想到去保护自己的小女人。还有一种女人既不知道关心体贴人，又从不向男人低头示弱，这样的女人最让男人无可奈何。

24. 有外遇并非坏男人的专利，好男人一样有，所以当你遇到这样的男人时，不要一棍子打死，可以试着给一次机会，能改还是可以在一起的。几十年的感情不容易，对于男人的偶尔出轨，有时候不必看得过重。

25. 都说一个成功的男人背后，常常有一个默默无闻的支持他的女人，那一个失败的男人的背后，是不是也常常有一个明明有闻的瞎捣乱的女人呢？

26. 浪漫是什么？是送花？雨中漫步？楼前伫立不去？如果两人彼此倾心相爱，什幺事都不做，静静相对都会感觉是浪漫的。否则，即使两人坐到月亮上拍拖，也是感觉不到浪漫的。

27. 学会用理解的，欣赏的眼光去看对方，而不是以自以为是的关心去管对方。

28. 幼稚的人和幼稚的人在一起没什么问题，成熟的人和成熟的人在一起也没什幺问题，成熟的人和幼稚的人在一起问题就多了。

29. 有的女人恋爱时让男友宠着自己，结婚后仍然要老公百般宠着自己，却忘记做为一个女人应该做的份内之事。这样的女人是不懂得爱情的。

30. 成熟的人不问过去；聪明的人不问现在；豁达的人不问未来。

Key tip for stress relief - Eat fruit and vegetables

2008-01-26T03:56:00.000-08:00

To deal with stressful situations our body needs an adequate reserve of nutriments like carbohydrates, vitamins, and minerals. Where could we get them more naturally and easily than from the food we eat daily? First of all, think fruit and vegetables.

Make vegetables part of every meal
Fresh fruit and vegetables are rich mines of vitamins and minerals. They provide almost all we need. Foods of animal origin are better sources of iron and vitamins B12, D and A, but otherwise fruit and vegetables provide much of what we need, plus other nutriments a swell: fibre to improve digestion (constipation makes us irritable); carbohydrates to provide energy for the tissues (without them we soon get tired); water to help prevent dehydration (90% of some vegetables consists of water).
We ought to eat some fruit and/or vegetables at every meal. If you have got out of this good habit, now is the time to do something about it. Spare the time to go to the market to choose fresh fruit and vegetables. Organic produce is just as good nutritionally as produce grown using chemical fertilizers and pesticides but without the risk of toxic residues in the food.

DID YOU KNOW?
>The contents of fruit and vegetables all differ. However, you don't need a calculator to ensure that you are eating all your body needs every day.
>Just vary regularly the color of the produce you eat, because the different colours are largely due to different vitamins and minerals.
>For example orange-coloured fruit and vegetables (melons, carrots, apricots) contain beta-carotene, which is converted to vitamin A in the gut, whilst green-leaved vegetables (spinach, cress, cabbages) contain calcium.

Eat raw or gently steamed
Vitamins are fragile and temperamental; some oxidize on contact with air, some dissolve in water and are lost, whilst others are damaged by heat. To be sure of not losing even the smallest amount, eat at least two portions of uncooked salad vegetables and two fresh fruits daily. Wash them under the tap but never soak them in water. When cooking vegetables, choose the more gentle methods (steaming or a low flame). If you do boil vegetables, keep the water to use for a soup or as the base of a sauce: it is full of vitamins!

KEY FACTS

Fruit and vegetables provide us with vitamins, minerals, carbohydrates, fibre and water

It's better to choose organic

Eat five portions of fruit or vegetables daily

Vary the colours in order to eat a range of vitamins and minerals

史上最强最色情最火爆最短的小说集合

2008-01-26T03:10:00.000-08:00

1、近年来中国最精彩的写实小说，全文八个字：
此地钱多人傻速来
据说是发自杭州市宝石山下一出租房的汇款单上的简短附言，是该按摩女给家乡妹妹汇款时随手涂鸦的，令无数专业作家汗颜！

2、最短的幽默小说《夜》
男：疼么？
女：嗯！
男：那……算了？
女：别！

3、一次短篇小说大赛规定作品，要涉及政治，宗教、性以及悬念。
结果得金奖的小说是这样的：上帝啊，女王怀孕了，谁干的？
*******后来衍生出来的： My god，圣母又吐了！*******

4、世界最短科幻小说
最后一个地球人坐在家里，突然响起了敲门声。

5、世界最短恐怖小说
惊醒，身边躺着自己的尸体。

6、世界最短黑帮小说
穿上马甲，别让人认出来。

7、世界最短童话
癞蛤蟆娶到天鹅喽！

8、世界最短寓言
蚂蚁累死了，蚁后还那么胖。

9、世界最短乱伦小说（日本）
女：哥，你比爸强多了！
男：妈也这么说！

10、据说这篇小说表现了女性意识觉醒
男：请你吃饭。
女：改日吧！

11、反贪反腐小说
领导告诉男部下：要提前（钱）申请。
领导告诉女部下：日后再说。

12、爱情暴力小说
题目《别每天纠缠着我要我负责任把孩子生下来然后结婚让你变成你老妈那样的女人》
正文：“啪。”

13、最强最短的武侠小说（定稿完全版）
小说要求：
1、要同时涉及3大门派；
2、要包含江湖门派间多年恩怨情仇，又要打破世俗伦理；
3、情节还要扣人心悬，大有血雨腥风呼之欲来。令人极为期待该小说之续集，同时留下n多悬念；
4、越短越好。
第2天，有人来投稿，全文只有十个字：
秃驴，竟敢跟贫道抢师太！
编辑复语：恩怨情仇，血雨腥风确有，且短小精悍，n多悬念，但侠骨有余，柔情不足。虽江湖儿女，但也有柔情万种。
第3天，修改稿：
师太，你就放弃秃驴，从了贫道吧！
编辑又语：江湖儿女，柔情尽显，缠绵悱恻。但仍拘泥世俗伦理。
第4天，第三稿：
贱尼，你竟敢跟老衲抢道长！
编辑三思，语：打破世俗伦理之作，血雨腥风也呼之欲来，扣人心弦，悬念n多，但总是少点什么……
第5天，终结稿：
和尚：“师太，你从了老衲吧！”
道长：“秃驴，竟敢跟老道抢师太！”
师太：“大师、道长，你们一起上吧，我赶时间。”

美丽女医生的性骚扰

2008-01-26T03:08:00.002-08:00

美丽的女医生在医院大受男病人的欢迎，浪漫、多金的追求者众多，当然，也遇到不少性骚扰

......

有一天，王先生在医院做完不孕症检查後，美丽的女医生要检查王先生的精虫数目有没有减少。她给他一个密封的小玻璃罐子，要他回家装些样本带来。

第二天，王先生再来，女医生却发现玻璃罐仍是空空如也。王先生解释说：『昨天，我先用右手试了半天，没有动静，我改用左手试，还是没有用，我叫我太太来帮忙，她也是两支手都试，也是没有用。我叫她用嘴巴弄，仍然没有办法。女医生听得满脸通红。

王先生仍不停地说：『刚好我表妹到我家来送礼，她比较年轻体力好，我就拜托她来帮忙。她也是先用手，再用嘴，很努力地。.....

停！停！女医生再也忍不住了：『这种事...你找你表妹帮忙做~?』

王先生说：『她很乐意啊！可是还是不行！我才来找你，看你能不能..........』

女医生一听怒问：『能不能什么？』

王先生答说：『能不能把这个玻璃罐的盖子打开啊！』

一帅哥欲买避孕套

2008-01-26T03:08:00.001-08:00

一帅哥欲买避孕套，不知道尺寸，服务小姐无奈下手检查，一边对身边的同事说：来一盒5寸的哦不7寸的...哦，天哪，快拿卫生纸。。。。。。。。

怀孕做爱要小心（活人要笑死~）

2008-01-26T03:06:00.001-08:00

某年某月某日，在某个地方的某个家庭里，一位太太怀孕了。而在第9个月的时候，先生却忍不住个人的欲望，所以就强迫他太太跟他做“爱做的事”……

一个月后，小孩出生了，是个男生，而且是个天才！一出生就会讲话！只见他转头一看见医生就问：“你是不是我爸？”医生：“不是，我是医生。”他看到了护士，也问：“那你是不是我爸？”护士：“不……我是护士。”最后他看到了他的亲生父亲：“那你是我爸啰？”先生很高兴：“对！我就是你的爸爸！”结果小孩就很生气的拿手指戳他老爸的头一边骂：“这样戳你痛不痛？痛不痛？”

太太又怀孕了。而在第9个月的时候，先生却忍不住个人的欲望，所以就强迫他太太跟他做“爱做的事”……

一个月后，小孩出生了，是个女孩，而且是个天才！一出生就会讲话！只见她转头一看见医生就问：“你是不是我爸？”医生：“不是，我是医生。”她看到了护士士，也问：“那你是不是我爸？”护士：“不……我是护士。”最后她看到了她的亲生父亲：“那你是我爸啰？”先生很高兴：“对！我就是你的爸爸！”结果小孩就很生气的把嘴里的东西吐到她爸头上,问道：“这样脏不脏,脏不脏？”

再后来,夫妻两人采取了避孕措施,一天他太太跟他做“爱做的事”……避孕套不小心掉进去了,先生找一筷子往外拨拉..不小心筷子也掉进去....10个月后,孩子出生了,产房一声尖叫,先生问护士怎么了...护士瞪着眼睛说："你孩子穿着雨衣,拄着拐棍出来了...”

Jokes

2008-01-26T02:59:00.000-08:00

Wife is like a TV. Girlfriend is like handphone.
At home watch TV. Go out bring handphone.
No money sell TV. Got money change handphone.
Sometimes enjoy TV but most of the time play with handphone.
TV free for life but....
Handphone, if you don't pay, services will be terminated....!

--------------------

TEACHER : Balgobin, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
BALGOBIN : No, teacher, it's the same dog!

--------------------

TEACHER : Balgobin, how do you spell "crocodile"?
BALGOBIN : "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
BALGOBIN : Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!

--------------------

Two car salesmen were sitting at the bar. One complained to the other, "Boy, business sucks. If I don't sell more cars this month, I'm going to lose my fucking ass!"

Too late - he noticed a beautiful blonde, sitting two stools away. Immediately, he offered apologies for his use of bad language.

"That's okay," the blonde replied, "I have a very similar problem ... If I don't sell more ass this month, I'm going to lose my fucking car!"

-------------------

Math problems? Call 1-800-[(10x)(13i)^2]-[sin(xy)/2.362x].

-------------------

A man is having problems with his Johnson which certainly had seen better times. He consults a doctor who, after a couple of tests, says, "Sorry, but you've overdone it the last 30 years. Your dick is burned out; you only have 30 erections left in your penis."

The man walks home (deeply depressed); his wife is already expecting him at the front door and asks him what the doctor said concerning his problem. He tells her what the doc told him. She says, "Oh no, only 30 times! We shouldn't waste that. We should make a list!"

He replies, "Yes, I already made a list on the way home. Sorry, your name isn't on it."

----------------------

Two deaf people get married. During the first week of marriage, they find that they are unable to communicate in the bedroom when they turn off the lights because they can't see each other using sign language. After several nights of fumbling around and misunderstandings, the wife decides to find a solution.

"Honey," she signs, "Why don't we agree on some simple signals? For instance, at night, if you want to have sex with me, reach over and squeeze my left breast one time. If you don't want to have sex, reach over and squeeze my right breast one time."

The husband thinks this is a great idea and signs back to his wife, "Great idea. Now if you want to have sex with me, reach over and pull on my penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, reach over and pull on my penis 50 times."

------------------------

Little Girl:"Mommy I just found out that the little boy next door has a penis like a peanut"
Mommy:"u mean its small?"
Little Girl:"No its salty"

------------------------

a good lecture should be like a girl's mini-skirt
short enough to create an interest and long enough to cover a subject.

-----------------------

Women's top 7 lies:

1. I love u
2. I am virgin
3. I hate sex
4. U r 1st who is touching me
5. Oh! It's too big never seen b4
6. I hate sucking
7. OK ! only once (:P)

------------------------

ANGER MANAGEMENT

Husband to wife: When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your anger?

Wife: I clean the toilet bowl.

Husband: How does that help?

Wife: I use your toothbrush.

------------------------------

Key tip for stress relief - Make sure you get enough magnesium

2008-01-26T02:44:00.001-08:00

Magnesium is the main fuel of the brain and central nervous system. When we are stressed we use up enormous amounts of it. When we do not get sufficient, we become irritable and nervous. Make sure your diet contains enough magnesium.

Less anxiety, more sleep

Magnesium is not of the most essential minerals. Our body needs it to successfully complete many tasks: to convert lipids and carbohydrates into energy, to produce antibodies that protect us from diseases, to regulate body temperature and, above all, to resist stress! We have a vital need for magnesium to transmit nerve impulses through the nerves and spinal cord as well as the brain. Without enough magnesium we become agitated, irritable and nervous. We do not sleep well. We can no longer tolerate the slightest annoyance. It acts as a sort of natural sedative, controlling anxiety and helping us to sleep.

DID YOU KNOW

>Calcium works hand-in-hand with magnesium. Calcium is not only a mineral found in bones! It also acts as regulator of hte central nervous system.

>The daily requirement of magnesium is 300-400 mg.

Wholemeal bread, dark chocolate and mineral water

The recommended daily intake of magnesium for an adult is 300-400 mg. However, many factors can increase the amount we need: strong emotions, distress, fear, certain drugs like antibiotics, and even cold weather.
Good sources of magnesium include wholemeal bread, wholemeal cereals, dark chocolate, nuts (almonds, hazelnuts) and pules (haricot beans, chickpeas). It is also found in some mineral waters. If you are going through a stressful time, make these foods a part of your daily diet. Although they contain plenty of calories, they will not make you fat if you take care to adjust your other food intake.

KEY FACTS

Magnesium is vital for the efficient transmission of nerve impulses.

It is found in nuts, pulses, wholemeal bread and dark chocolate.

Don't forget that some mineral waters are very rich in magnesium.

Just ....

(1) Funny

Budget Wedding Cake

Pomeranian Mei Tai

Sponsored Contraceptives

Love is BLIND

How to Impress a Woman/Man

How to Impress a Woman:

How to Impress a Man:

Gold plated Mercedes-Benz C63 AMG for the uber rich

Couple gets their deceased pooch cloned for $155,000 from BornRich

2009 McDonald's Calender

Sandar story

Letters to Bill Gate

十句值得深思的话

The Picture

Nine year old Junior

Potential Employee's Application

Imagination

Pain In the Back

男人不坏，女人不爱呀！

joke

Chinese jokes (18+)

Our daily chicken

A mental hospital

Scared sleeping

Pay for your past bills

Application rejections

A mental hospital

Crazy people talk

Passing an exam

cartoon

Boy & his mom (18+)

Helisoft

Joke (18+)

色鬼的交易 (18+)

好男人与坏男人的区别

女人要不起的13类男人

女人以身相许的九大误区

GOOD FACTS (JUST AS A FUN )

Don't cheat the kids

about love ...

Gtalk Tips n shortcuts (may be u know this)

Under the influence

Little Nancy's pet

Next Time You Think Life is Hard...Think Again! (传说中的人棍)

Solar Powered Notebook with GPS & Satellite Phone

24 Karat Gold Custom Sneakers

The devoted wife

Respectfully Cheating (joke 18+)

few words that i like

eGO and lOVE

So, Kill ego and Save Love

Upgrading Errors (joke)

Just for Laugh (I hope you like it.)

男人眼中完老婆必具备10点

List of youngest birth mothers

Sexy Furniture by Mario Philippona - Erotic, Inviting, and Expensive!

Multi Monitor Desk System with the flipIT advantage

Enjoy your vacation 24/7 with Patio Scenes

Wise old man

Poor old man

谁是成功男人背后的星女孩 (6)

男人对女人de期盼

46个不可不知的生活小常识 (part II)

46个不可不知的生活小常识 (part I)

Find yourself ... :P

一句话笑话(成人版)

成功的婚姻只有爱不够

Home entertainment gets HOT with the Vok Multimedia Fireplace

最实用的爱情原则

姐弟恋的五大科学依据

女人千万不能在男友面前说的四句话

偷听夜晚同房事

十二生肖08年运程最全解析

不可错过五种上品男人

看上了一个女孩该如何去追呢？

男生有了女朋友后的20个惨状

男人最讨厌的女人的缺点

与老婆吵架的10大好处